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The way of the gentleman is expensive and hidden. The foolishness of a husband and wife can be understood, but when it reaches the extreme, even a sage will not know it. The unworthy husband and wife can do something, but when it reaches the extreme, even a sage will not be able to do it. The universe is so big, but people still have something to regret. Therefore, when a gentleman speaks big, no one in the world can contain it; when he speaks small, no one in the world can break it. The Book of Songs says, "The kite flies to the sky, and the fish leaps in the deep." It means that he is observant of everything. The way of a gentleman starts with husband and wife, and when it reaches the extreme, he observes the universe.
To think about the constitution and seek the good is enough to be famous, but not enough to move the masses; to follow the virtuous and understand the distant is enough to move the masses, but not enough to transform the people. If a gentleman wants to transform the people and establish customs, he must learn!
When Zigong asked about mourning, Confucius said, "Respect is the best, grief is the next, and thinness is the worst. The color of the face reflects the feelings; the sorrowful expression reflects the clothes." When asked about the mourning of brothers, Confucius said, "The mourning of brothers is recorded in the books and strategies. "A gentleman does not take away the mourning of others, nor should he take away his own mourning. Confucius said: "Shaolian and Dalian are good at mourning. They do not get tired for three days and do not stop for three months. They are sad for a long time and worried for three years. They are the sons of Dongyi. ”
Even if the food for funerals is bad, it must satisfy hunger. It is not proper to stop work when hungry; it is also not proper to forget to mourn when full. A gentleman is worried about those who cannot see clearly, hear well, walk straight, and do not know how to mourn. Therefore, if a person is sick and drinks alcohol and eats meat, he will not be sick at the age of 50, and will not be sick at the age of 60. If he drinks alcohol and eats meat at the age of 70, it is all because he is suspected of death. In mourning, if someone calls him to eat, he will not go. For those who have done great deeds or less, after the funeral, they will go to the people, and people will eat it. Those who are his party will eat it, but those who are not his party will not eat it. For those who have done less deeds, they will eat vegetables and fruits, and drink water and soup, but no salt or cheese. If you cannot eat food, salt and cheese are fine. Confucius said: "If you have a sore on your body, you should bathe; if you have a wound on your head, you should wash your body; if you are sick, you should drink alcohol and eat meat. If you are sick, you will be sick, and a gentleman will not do it. If you die of sickness, a gentleman will say that you have no children. ”
The Book of Rites says: "A gentleman embraces his grandson but not his son." This means that a grandson can serve as the king's father's corpse, but a son cannot serve as his father's corpse. When a great official sees a corpse of a king, he should bow down. If the king knows why he is preparing a corpse, he should bow down himself, and the corpse must be arranged in a proper manner. The carriage must be on a platform.
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