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Sima Huan was ill. Xie Gong went to visit his sick father and entered through the east gate. Duke Huan looked at him from a distance and sighed, "It has been a long time since I have seen such a man among my followers!"
Wang Rong said: "The Taiwei has a lofty and clear appearance, like a jade tree in a grove of jade trees, so he is naturally a worldly being."
A gentleman is one who is well-informed, strong in knowledge, and humble, and who is kind and not lazy. A gentleman does not exhaust people's favors or exhaust people's loyalty, but maintains friendship.
Someone asked: "What is the cane for?" The answer is: a filial son who has lost his parents cries countless times, serves for three years, and becomes sick and thin, so he uses a cane to support the sick. If the father is still alive, he dare not use a cane, because the respected person is still alive; he does not use a cane in the hall, because he avoids the respected person's place; he does not rush in the hall, because he is not in a hurry. This is the will of a filial son, the reality of human nature, and the principle of etiquette and righteousness. It does not come from heaven or earth, but is just human nature.
The Duke said, “Why don’t gentlemen today practice this?” Confucius said, “Gentlemen today are insatiable in their love of goods, untiring in their indulgence of virtue, idle and arrogant, and are sure to destroy the people. They use the people at noon to attack those who have the Way; they seek what they want, not what they should. In the past, people were used from the front, but now people are used from the back. Gentlemen today do not practice etiquette.”
Xian Zi Suo said: "I heard that in ancient times, there was no decline, and the upper and lower classes each chose their relatives. Teng Bowen mourned for Menghu, his uncle; he mourned for Mengpi, his uncle." Hou Mu said: "Mourning, I heard from the county masters that mourning must be thought deeply and long, and the coffin should be changed inside and outside. I will do the same when I die." Zengzi said: "The corpse has not been decorated yet, so the hall is covered with curtains, and the burial is small and the curtains are clear." Zhongliangzi said: "The husband and wife are in chaos, so the hall is covered with curtains, and the burial is small and the curtains are clear." For the small burial, Ziyou said: "In the east." Zengzi said: "In the west, the mat is gathered." The small burial was in the west, which was a loss in the late Lu ritual. Xianzi said, "The mourning clothes and skirts are not ancient." Zi Pu died, and the weeping people cried out. Zi Gao said, "This is wild." The weeping people changed.
As a son, you should not live in the main hall, sit in the middle of the seat, walk in the middle of the road, or stand in the middle of the door. Food is not for the sake of abundance, and sacrifice is not for the sake of corpses. Listen to the silent and see the invisible. Do not climb high, do not stand near deep places. Don't criticize carelessly, don't smile carelessly.
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