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Confucius said, "Rituals are what the people in the streets indulge in. They make the differences between the people and make them have no suspicion. They serve as rules for the people." Therefore, men and women do not have intercourse without a matchmaker, and do not meet without money, fearing that there will be no difference between men and women. With this, the people in the streets still offer themselves. The Book of Songs says, "How can you cut wood? Without an axe, you cannot do it; how can you marry? Without a matchmaker, you cannot get it; how can you plant hemp? You follow her across the field; how can you marry a wife? You must tell her parents." Confucius said, "Do not marry a wife with the same surname, so as to distinguish them." Therefore, if you do not know the surname of a concubine when buying one, you should consult a fortune teller. Because of this people, the Spring and Autumn Annals of Lu still removed the surname of the lady and called her Wu, and her death was called Mengzi's death. Confucius said: "In the ritual, men and women do not exchange titles except for sacrifices." Because of this people, Yang Hou still killed Mu Hou and stole his wife. Therefore, the ritual of the lady was abolished at the grand feast. Confucius said: "If you don't see the son of a widow, you will not be friends with her. The gentleman keeps a distance from her." Therefore, when making friends, if the host is not at home, you will not enter her house unless there is a major reason. Because of this people, the people still value beauty more than virtue. Confucius said: "Love virtue is like love beauty." The princes did not go below the temptation of beauty. Therefore, the gentleman kept a distance from beauty as a rule for the people. Therefore, men and women do not touch each other. When you touch a woman, you should offer your left hand. If the daughter of a aunt, sister or daughter returns after marriage, men should not sit at the same table with her. A widow should not cry at night. If a woman is sick, you should not ask about her illness. Because of this people, the people are still licentious and chaotic in the clan. Confucius said: "At a wedding, the groom personally welcomes the bride and greets the uncle and aunt. The uncle and aunt pass the bride to the groom, fearing that the matter will go wrong." Because of this, some women still do not attend.

Confucius said, "If you are respectful, you can use the sacrificial vessels. Therefore, a gentleman does not abandon etiquette for cheapness, nor does he abandon etiquette for beauty." Therefore, the etiquette of eating is: if the host personally presents the food, the guest will offer the food; if the host does not personally present the food, the guest will not offer the food. Therefore, if a gentleman is not polite, he will not eat even if the food is beautiful. The Book of Changes says, "The eastern neighbor slaughters a cow, but it is not as good as the western neighbor's sacrifice, which actually benefits him." The Book of Songs says, "After being drunk with wine, after being full with virtue." This shows the people, the people still compete for profit and forget righteousness. Confucius said, "Seven days of abstention, three days of preparation, carry one person to make a corpse, and those who pass by will run away, to teach respect." Li wine is in the room, Di wine is in the hall, and Cheng wine is below, to show the people not to be licentious. The corpse drinks three times, and the guests drink once, to show the people that there is a hierarchy. Because of the wine and meat, the clans gather together to teach the people to be harmonious. Therefore, the upper hall observes the room, and the lower hall observes the upper. The Book of Songs says: "The etiquette is complete, and the laughter is complete."




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