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People regard Xie Shang as Lingda. Ruan Yaoji says: "It is as clear and fluent as Da." Some say: "Shang is naturally Lingda."
Officials do not borrow sacrificial utensils. Before sacrificial utensils are made, banquet utensils are not made.
After crying, taboos are used. In etiquette, do not taboo names that are disliked. Two names are not tabooed. If you are in the service of your parents, you should taboo the king's parents; if you are not in the service of your parents, you should not taboo the king's parents. The king has no private taboos, and the nobles have public taboos. There is no taboo in the "Book of Songs" and "Book of Documents", and there is no taboo in writing. There is no taboo in the temple. The taboos of wives, even in front of the king, are not taboos; women do not taboo when leaving home. There is no taboo for major or minor merits. Ask about the prohibitions when entering the country, ask about the customs when entering the country, and ask about the taboos when entering the door.
Zeng Zi asked: "Can the funeral of a major merit be included in the offering of sacrifices?" Confucius said: "It is not a major merit! "Zengzi asked, "Is it not possible to make sacrifices with light clothes?" Confucius said, "That is not what I mean. In the funerals of the Son of Heaven and the dukes, those who are in mourning clothes offer sacrifices; the high officials, those who are in mourning clothes offer sacrifices; the scholars, their friends offer sacrifices; if it is not enough, they take from those who are of great merit or less; if it is not enough, they take from those who are of great merit or less." Zengzi asked, "Can small merits be included in the sacrifices?" Confucius said, "Why must it be small merits? Those who are in mourning clothes and below offer sacrifices; that is etiquette." Zengzi asked, "Is it not possible to make sacrifices with light clothes?" Confucius said, "In the funerals of the Son of Heaven and the dukes, those who are not in mourning clothes do not offer sacrifices; the high officials, those who are in mourning clothes offer sacrifices; the scholars, if the sacrifice is not enough, they take from those who are of great merit or less." Zengzi asked, "Can acquaintances, if they are in mourning clothes, participate in the sacrifices?" Confucius said, "If you don't offer sacrifices, how can you help others?" Zengzi asked, "Can you take away your mourning clothes and participate in the sacrifices?" ”Confucius said: "Saying mourning and offering sacrifices are not rites; it is OK to reject each other."
Wang Changshi said to Jiang Daoqun: "People can have what they should have, but they don't have to have it; people can have what they should not have, but I must not have it."
When Emperor Yuan first crossed the river, he said to Gu Huqi: "I am living in a foreign country, and I always feel ashamed." Rong knelt and replied: "I heard that the king regards the world as his home, so Geng and Bo have no fixed place, and the Nine Cauldrons were moved to Luoyi. I hope Your Majesty will not think about moving the capital."
The etiquette for being a son is: be warm in winter and cool in summer, be alert at dusk and check on others in the morning, and do not argue with the ugly and the barbaric.
Xu Yuan once visited Jianwen. It was a windy and calm night with a bright moon, so they composed music and talked in the room. Expressing one’s inner thoughts is Xu’s forte. The words are clear and graceful, more than usual. Although Jianwen and he had always been in sync, this encounter was even more regrettable. Unconsciously they knelt down and spoke with their hands, and the conversation lasted until almost dawn. Then he said: "Xuan Du has great talent and sentiment, so it is not easy to give him many compliments."
When the husband of an aunt or sister dies, and there are no brothers in the husband's party, let the husband's family members take charge of the funeral. The wife's party, even if they are close, do not take charge. If the husband has no family, then the front and back families, the east and west families; if there is none, then the village Yin will take charge. Some say: take charge, and attach to the husband's party.
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