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Do not talk about music in mourning, do not talk about bad things during sacrifices, and do not talk about women in public courts.
A gentleman is one who is well-informed, strong in knowledge, and humble, and who is kind and not lazy. A gentleman does not exhaust people's favors or exhaust people's loyalty, but maintains friendship.
Yin Zhongkan's father was ill and suffered from palpitations. He heard ants moving under his bed and thought it was a fight between bulls. Xiaowu did not know that it was the Duke of Yin, so he asked Zhongkan, "Is there a Yin who is so sick?" Zhongkan burst into tears and stood up, saying, "I only know how to advance and retreat."
Zengzi said: "The filial son provides for the elderly by making his heart happy and not violating his will, making his ears and eyes happy, making his bed comfortable, and providing him with food and drink. The filial son who is loyal to the parents provides for the whole life. The whole life is not the whole life of the parents, but the whole life of the parents. Therefore, the parents also love what they love and respect what they respect. This is true even for dogs and horses, let alone humans!" Regarding the provision of elderly care, the Five Emperors had regulations and the Three Kings had requests for advice. The Five Emperors followed the rule of nurturing the spirit and not asking for advice. If they did something good, they would record it as a dunshi. The Three Kings also followed the rule of nurturing the elderly and then asking for advice. They also did not follow the etiquette and all had dunshi.
Zi You asked about funeral supplies, and Confucius said, "It is called the family's death." Zi You said, "If there is a death, how can it be prepared?" Confucius said, "If there is a death, don't go too far. If the body is dead, put the head and body together, return to the burial, hang the coffin and seal it, who will criticize it!" Si Shi Ben told Zi You, "Please cover the bed." Zi You said, "Yes." Xianzi heard it and said, "How rude Shu Shi is! He only gives people etiquette."
In the sixth year of Yongjia, Wei Xima died. Xie Kun cried for him, which moved passers-by. During the Xianhe period, the Prime Minister Wang Gong advised: "Wei Xima should be reburied. He was a famous and elegant man, admired by the whole country. We can offer a small sacrifice to maintain the old friendship."
When Chu Qisheng was young, Xie Gong knew him very well and always said, "If Chu Qisheng is not good, I will not continue to be a fortune teller."
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