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The so-called self-cultivation is to regulate one's family. One should avoid what one loves, avoid what one despises, avoid what one fears, avoid what one pities, and avoid what one is lazy about. Therefore, there are few people in the world who know the evil of what one likes and the beauty of what one hates. Therefore, there is a proverb: "No one knows the evil of his son, and no one knows the greatness of his seedling. "This means that if you do not cultivate yourself, you cannot manage your family.
When Duke Yu was the Protector General, he asked Huan Tingwei to find a good official, and the search lasted for years. Queen Huan met Xu Ning and learned about it, so she told Yu Gong: "What others should have, you don't have to have; what others should not have, you don't have to not have. He is truly a pure man in the sea and mountains."
Le Ling was good at speaking clearly but not good at writing. He was about to resign the post of Governor of Henan and asked Pan Yue to be his deputy. Pan Yun said, "You can do it. But it must satisfy your Majesty." Le Wei described why he was humble, with about 200 words to indicate his position. Pan Zhi became a famous writer because of his intricate and complex writing. People at that time all said: "If the music had not borrowed Pan's writing, and Pan had not taken the purpose of the music, it would not have been possible to achieve this."
銆銆Wang Rong said: "The Grand Protector lived in the Zhengshi period, and he was not among those who could speak well. When he spoke to him, his reasoning was clear and far-reaching, and no one could use virtue to cover up his words!"
When Sun Qiyou and Qizhuang were young, they visited Duke Yu. The Duke asked, "What is Qiyou's name?" He replied, "Qiyou." The Duke said, "What Qi do you want?" He replied, "Qi Xuyou." "What is Qizhuang's name?" He replied, "Qi Zhuang." The Duke asked, "What Qi do you want?" He replied, "Qi Zhuangzhou." The Duke said, "Why do you admire Zhuangzhou instead of Confucius?" He replied, "Sages are knowledgeable, so they are hard to admire." Duke Yu was very pleased with the child's answer.
The Duke said, 鈥淢ay I ask what is meant by respecting oneself?鈥 Confucius replied, 鈥淲hen a gentleman speaks too much, the people will make excuses; when he acts too much, the people will make examples. If a gentleman does not speak too much and does not act too much, the people will respect him without being ordered. In this way, he can respect himself; if he can respect himself, he can complete his parents. 鈥漈he Duke said, 鈥淢ay I ask what is meant by completing his parents?鈥 Confucius replied, 鈥淎 gentleman is a name for people. The people call him a son of a gentleman. This is to make their parents become gentlemen, and this is to complete their parents鈥 name!鈥 Confucius then said, 鈥淚n ancient times, the most important thing in governing was to love people. If you cannot love people, you cannot have your body; if you cannot have your body, you cannot be at peace with your land; if you cannot be at peace with your land, you cannot be happy with heaven; if you cannot be happy with heaven, you cannot complete your body.鈥
Wang Youjun and Xie Gong went to see Ruan Gong. When they reached the door, they said to Xie: "So we should jointly recommend the master." Xie said: "It is difficult to recommend the master."
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