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Etiquette begins with the coming of age, is based on the wedding, is more important than funerals and sacrifices, is more respected than the morning engagement, and is harmonious with the archery field - this is the general outline of etiquette.
Even if the food for funerals is bad, it must satisfy hunger. It is not proper to stop work when hungry; it is also not proper to forget to mourn when full. A gentleman is worried about those who cannot see clearly, hear well, walk straight, and do not know how to mourn. Therefore, if a person is sick and drinks alcohol and eats meat, he will not be sick at the age of 50, and will not be sick at the age of 60. If he drinks alcohol and eats meat at the age of 70, it is all because he is suspected of death. In mourning, if someone calls him to eat, he will not go. For those who have done great deeds or less, after the funeral, they will go to the people, and people will eat it. Those who are his party will eat it, but those who are not his party will not eat it. For those who have done less deeds, they will eat vegetables and fruits, and drink water and soup, but no salt or cheese. If you cannot eat food, salt and cheese are fine. Confucius said: "If you have a sore on your body, you should bathe; if you have a wound on your head, you should wash your body; if you are sick, you should drink alcohol and eat meat. If you are sick, you will be sick, and a gentleman will not do it. If you die of sickness, a gentleman will say that you have no children. ”
Zi said: "A gentleman refuses the noble but not the humble, refuses the rich but not the poor, then chaos will be eliminated." Therefore, a gentleman would rather let people float above food than let food float above others. Confucius said: "If you give way to wine, beans and meat and accept the bad, the people will offend the teeth; if you give way to the seat on the lapel and sit down, the people will offend the noble; if you give way to the position in the court and accept the humble, the people will offend the monarch. "The Book of Songs says: "The people are unscrupulous, resenting one another; accepting titles without yielding them, they have finally died." Confucius said: "A gentleman values others and despises himself, and puts others before himself, so the people will yield to him." Therefore, call someone else's ruler "Jun", and call yourself "Guojun". Confucius said: "In the interests of salary, those who die first and those who live later, then the people will not be disloyal; those who die first and those who survive later, then the people can be trusted." The Book of Songs says: "The thoughts of the former rulers were kept by the gullible." With this, the people still disloyalty died and cried without complaint.
The son of a good blacksmith must learn to make fur coats; the son of a good archer must learn to make winnowing baskets; the beginner must do the opposite, with the chariot in front of the horse. A gentleman who observes these three things can be determined to study.
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