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Xie Youyu said: "My friend Wang Meizi is clear and fluent, Ji Yanzu is broad-minded, elegant and profound, and Dong Zhongdao is outstanding and well-mannered."
King Sima Jing went on an expedition to the east and captured Li Xi of Shangdang and made him a Zhonglang Attendant. He then asked Xi, "My father invited you to come, but you refused. Now I am calling you. Why did you come?" Xi replied, "My father treated me with courtesy, so I was able to advance and retreat with courtesy. You are a man of law, and I came here out of fear of the law!"
Serving a gentleman, when a gentleman ascends or descends, he hands him a rein; when he starts to ride, he must show respect; when a gentleman descends, he must stand back. When riding in a second carriage, he must show respect, but not in the assistant carriage. For the second carriage, the princes have seven, the senior officials have five, and the junior officials have three. The horses and carriages of the two-carriage man are not to be trifled with. Look at the clothes, swords, and horses of the gentleman, and do not buy them.
Zhang Jiying was unrestrained and was called the Jiangdong Infantryman by his contemporaries. Someone said to him: "You can indulge yourself for a while, but don't you care about your reputation after death?" He replied: "If I have a reputation after death, it is better to have a glass of wine now!"
The mortar is made of a 椈, and the pestle is made of a wutong. The loquat is made of mulberry, three feet long; or five feet. The end is made of mulberry, three feet long, and the handle and end are carved. The belts of the princes and officials are all five-colored; the scholars are Second collection. Li is rice wine. The urn, jar, and basket should be filled only when the contents are visible. It is heavy, and should be buried after the funeral.
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
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