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When Wang Changshi was seriously ill, he lay under the stirrup, turned the whisk to look at him, and sighed, "A man like him will never live to be forty!" When he died, Liu Yin came to the funeral and stuck the whisk with a rhinoceros horn handle into the coffin, and was heartbroken.
Men and women have different heights. When a man is twenty, he is crowned and given a name. In front of the father, it is the son's name; in front of the king, it is the minister's name. When a girl is betrothed, she is given a name after she reaches the age of marriage.
Emperor Ming of Wei built a house for his grandmother at the Zhen family. After it was completed, he went to inspect it and asked his attendants, "What should we name the pavilion?" The attendant Miao Xi said, "Your Majesty is as wise as the wise king; and more virtuous than Zeng and Min. The establishment of this pavilion is a tribute to your uncle, so it should be named 'Weiyang'."
Ruan Ji's sister-in-law once came back home, and Ji saw her and said goodbye to her. Or ridicule it. Ji said, "Is the etiquette designed for people like us?"
King Wen of Jin praised Ruan Sizong as extremely cautious. Whenever he spoke to him, his words were profound and far-reaching, and he never praised or criticized anyone.
Only the most holy man in the world can be wise and knowledgeable, enough to be in charge; generous and gentle, enough to be tolerant; strong and resolute, enough to be firm; dignified and upright, enough to be respectful; meticulous and discerning, enough to distinguish. He is vast and profound, and he always releases it. He is as vast as the sky, and as deep as the abyss. When he sees it, the people all respect it, when he speaks, the people all believe it, and when he acts, the people all praise it. Therefore, his reputation spreads throughout China and extends to the barbarians. Wherever boats and cars can reach, wherever human power can reach, wherever the sky covers, wherever the earth carries, wherever the sun and the moon shine, wherever frost and dew fall, all living beings respect their parents, so he is said to be in harmony with heaven.
It is said that to govern a country, you must first manage your family. There is no one who cannot teach his family but can teach others. Therefore, a gentleman does not leave home but teaches the country. Filial piety is the way to serve the king; respect for elders is the way to serve the elders; kindness is the way to lead the people. "Kang Gao" said: "It is like protecting a baby. "If you seek it with a sincere heart, even if you don't get it, you won't be far away. There has never been anyone who learned to raise a child before getting married. If one family is benevolent, the whole country will be benevolent; if one family is courteous, the whole country will be courteous; if one person is greedy and violent, the whole country will be in chaos. The mechanism is like this. This is what is meant by one word ruining things, and one person establishing a country. Yao and Shun led the world with benevolence, and the people followed them. Jie and Zhou led the world with violence, and the people followed them. What they ordered was contrary to what the people liked, and the people did not follow them. Therefore, a gentleman should have it in himself before seeking it in others, and not have it in himself before criticizing others. There has never been anyone who can persuade others with what he does not forgive. Therefore, governing a country starts with managing his family. The Book of Songs says, "The peach tree is young and tender, and its leaves are dense. The daughter is married, and she is a good wife." Only when she is a good wife can she teach the people of the country. The Book of Songs says, "Be a good brother and a good younger brother." Only when she is a good brother and a good younger brother can she teach the people of the country. The Book of Songs says, "Its etiquette is not wrong, and it is right for the four countries. ” He who is a father, son, and brother is a model, and then the people can follow it. This is what is meant by governing a country in order to regulate the family.
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