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The so-called self-cultivation is to regulate one's family. One should avoid what one loves, avoid what one despises, avoid what one fears, avoid what one pities, and avoid what one is lazy about. Therefore, there are few people in the world who know the evil of what one likes and the beauty of what one hates. Therefore, there is a proverb: "No one knows the evil of his son, and no one knows the greatness of his seedling. "This means that if you do not cultivate yourself, you cannot manage your family.
Xiahou Taichu once wrote while leaning against a pillar. It was raining heavily at the time, and a thunderbolt broke the pillar he was leaning against. His clothes were burnt, but his expression remained unchanged, and his book was also intact. The guests around were all stumbling and unable to stop.
Liu Yin often said of Wang Changshi: "He has a very open mind, but he is naturally restrained."
After Deng Jingling was dismissed from office, he went to the mountain tomb and met the Grand Marshal Huan Gong. The Duke asked him, "Why have you become thinner?" Deng said, "I feel ashamed of Shuda, and I cannot help but feel resentful for the broken steamer!"
Zhou Boren was the Minister of Personnel. He fell seriously ill at night in the province. At that time, Diao Xuanliang was the Minister of the Chancellery, and he rescued Bei and was very close to him. After a long time, there was a small loss. The next morning, Zhongzhi was informed and he came in a panic. As soon as he entered the house, Diao got out of bed and burst into tears, telling him about Boren's critical condition yesterday. Zhongzhi wrote on it by hand, and Diao made a copy of it and placed it beside the door. When he came forward, he did not even ask about the illness, but simply said, "You were a famous person in the Central Court, and you were as famous as He Changyu. How could you have any relationship with such a flatterer as Diao Xie?" Then he left.
Zhong Shiji was a man of intelligence and talent, but he did not know Ji Kang at first. Zhong Yao and other talented and wise men of the time went to look for Kang. Kang Fang was forging iron under a big tree, and Xiang Ziqi was assisting him in beating the drums. Kang Yang continued to hammer as if no one was around, and did not say a word for some time. Zhong got up and left. Kang asked, "What did you hear and why did you come? What did you see and why did you leave?" Zhong said, "I came because I heard and I left because I saw."
Xiang Xiong was the chief clerk of Henei. There were official matters that were not as good as his, and the prefect Liu Huai was furious, so he beat Xiang Xiong and sent him away. Later, Xiong became a Huangmen Lang and Liu became a Shizhong, but they did not speak to each other at first. When Emperor Wu heard this, he ordered Xiong to restore the friendship between the monarch and his subject. Xiong had no choice but to go to Liu, kowtowed twice and said, "I came here in response to the imperial edict, but now the friendship between the monarch and his subject is broken. What do you think?" Then he left. When Emperor Wu heard that there was still discord, he angrily asked Xiong, "I asked you to restore the friendship between monarch and subject. Why did you break it off?" Xiong said, "The gentlemen of the ancient times promoted others with courtesy and dismissed others with courtesy. The gentlemen of today promote others as if they were putting them on their knees and dismiss them as if they were throwing them into the abyss. I am fortunate enough not to be a leader of the army in Liuhe. How can I restore the friendship between monarch and subject?" Emperor Wu agreed.
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