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When Duke Huan of the Han Dynasty was on his northern expedition and passed through Jincheng, he saw the willows he had planted when he was in Langya, all of which were ten feet in circumference. He sighed and said, "If trees are like this, how can people bear it!" He climbed up the branches and held onto the twigs, tears streaming down his face.
Wang Dun led his troops to Daheng, and Emperor Ming came out of the central hall. Wen Qiao was the prefect of Danyang. The emperor ordered him to cut the big beam, but it was not cut yet. The emperor became furious and glared at him. Everyone around him was terrified. Summon all the gentlemen. When Qiao arrived, he did not thank him, but only asked for wine and roast meat. Wang Dao arrived in a moment, knelt barefoot on the ground and apologized, saying: "The majesty of Heaven is with Yan, so Wen Qiao has no time to apologize." Qiao then knelt down to apologize, and the emperor was relieved. Everyone admired the king's wise words.
The Duke said, “May I ask what is meant by completing your body?” Confucius replied, “No more than things.” The Duke said, “May I ask what is meant by the way of heaven for a gentleman? ” Confucius replied: “It is precious to have ‘never stop’. Just like the sun and the moon follow each other from east to west, it never stops. This is the way of heaven; it does not close for a long time. This is the way of heaven; things are accomplished without action. This is the way of heaven; it is bright after it is accomplished. ” The Duke said: “I am stupid and foolish. I am bothering your mind.” Confucius kicked the mat and replied: “A benevolent man does not go beyond things, and a filial son does not go beyond things. Therefore, a benevolent man serves his parents as he serves heaven, and serves heaven as he serves his parents. Therefore, a filial son completes himself.” The Duke said: “Now that I have heard this, what is the sin in the future?” Confucius replied: “Your Majesty’s words are a blessing to me.”
When Zi Liu's mother died, Zi Shuo asked for a feast. Zi Liu asked, "Why?" Zi Shuo said, "Please give porridge to my half brother's mother." Zi Liu said, "How can you bury your mother with porridge for someone else's mother? No." After the funeral, Zi Shuo wanted to use the remaining cloth to prepare the sacrificial utensils. Zi Liu said, "No, I have heard that a gentleman should not stay at home during a funeral. Please arrange for the poor among your brothers." The gentleman said, "If you plan for someone's military advisor, you will die; if you plan for someone's state, you will be destroyed." Gongshu Wenzi ascended to Xiaqiu, and Qu Boyu followed him. Wenzi said, "How happy this hill is. I want to be buried there when I die." Qu Boyu said, "If you are happy, then Yuan will come forward."
The king does not name the concubines of the ministers, the great officials do not name the nephews and daughters of the ministers, and the scholars do not name the concubines of the family. The son of a lord or a minister dare not call himself "my son"; the son of a minister or a scholar dare not call himself "the heir so-and-so", nor dare to have the same name as the heir. If the lord asks a scholar to shoot and he fails, he should excuse himself on the grounds of illness, saying, "I am worried about carrying firewood." It is not polite to serve a gentleman without looking back.
The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
The great officials of various countries, when entering the emperor's country, call themselves the so-and-so scholar; they call themselves the accompanying minister so-and-so. They call themselves the son outside, and the old man of the widowed monarch in their own country. The envoy calls himself so-and-so. The emperor does not speak out, and the princes do not give names.
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