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Someone asked: "Why do those who don't wear a cap wear it?" The answer is: It is what those who don't wear a cap wear. The Book of Rites says: "A boy does not wear mourning clothes, but only wears mourning clothes in the house." "Wearing clothes" means to be exempted, and in the house, he is exempted and caned.
Respect, prudence, and correctness before treating each other with affection, is the general principle of etiquette, and it is the way to establish the distinction between men and women, and the righteousness of husband and wife. There is a distinction between men and women, and then there is righteousness between husband and wife; there is righteousness between husband and wife, and then there is affection between father and son; there is affection between father and son, and then there is affection between ruler and minister. Correct. Therefore, it is said that the wedding ceremony is the root of etiquette.
When Cao Gong was young, he met Qiao Xuan, who said to him, "The world is in turmoil, with heroes fighting each other. Wouldn't you be the one to sort things out? But you are a hero in troubled times and a villain in peaceful times. I regret that I am old and cannot see you become rich and powerful. I will be a burden to my descendants."
Morality, benevolence and righteousness cannot be achieved without propriety, and teaching and correcting customs cannot be achieved without propriety. When resolving disputes, do not make the decision without proper etiquette. The relationship between the ruler and his subjects, father and son, and brothers cannot be determined without propriety. When an official studies or serves a teacher, he should not be close to him without proper etiquette. When Ban Chao governs the army and takes office to enforce the law, he must act with propriety and dignity. Praying to temples and offering sacrifices to ghosts and gods are not polite, sincere or solemn. Therefore, a gentleman is respectful, frugal, and yielding in order to show courtesy. Parrots can speak, but they are still birds; orangutans can speak, but they are still animals. People nowadays are rude, even if they can speak, don’t they have the heart of beasts? Only animals are so undisciplined that fathers and sons live together. Therefore, the sages created rituals to teach people. Teach people to be polite and know how to distinguish themselves from animals.
King Jiong of Qi was the Grand Marshal assisting in the administration, and Ji Shao was the Palace Attendant, who went to Jiong to consult on matters. Jiong set up a meeting of ministers and summoned Ge Yi, Dong Ai and others to discuss current affairs. Yi and others said to Jiong: "Minister Ji is good at playing stringed instruments. You can ask him to play it." So they sent the musical instruments. Shao Tui refused. Jiong said, "We are all happy today, why are you resisting?" Shao said, "You have assisted the royal family and made them do things in an exemplary manner. Although Shao is a low-ranking official, his duties are equivalent to those of an ordinary official. Playing silk and bamboo is the job of a musician. It cannot be dressed according to the rules of the previous kings, which is the occupation of the people of Wu. Now that I am forced to accept the emperor's order, I dare not refuse. I should put down my crown and wear private clothes. This is what Shao wants." Yu and others were dissatisfied and left.
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