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Women who are not in mourning for three years should not go beyond their fiefdoms to offer condolences. If they are in mourning for three years, then the wife of the ruler will return home.
Zi Yun: "A gentleman forgives his parents' faults and respects their virtues." The Analects says: "If one does not change his father's way for three years, he can be called filial." Gaozong said: "For three years, he did not speak, and he would complain if he spoke." Zi Yun: "If one obeys orders without anger, gives subtle advice without getting tired, and works hard without complaining, he can be called filial." The Book of Poetry
Zhang Zhan liked to plant pine and cypress trees in front of his study. Whenever Yuan Shansong went out for a trip, he would always ask his attendants to compose elegies. People at that time said, "The body was laid out under Zhang's house, and the funeral was held on Yuan's road."
The number of counts depends on where they sit. The number of chips is five in the room, seven in the hall, and nine in the courtyard. The length of the chip is two inches. The pot: the neck is seven inches long, the belly is five inches long, and the diameter is two and a half inches; it can hold five liters. The pot is filled with small beans, so that the arrows can jump out. The pot is two and a half arrows away from the mat. The arrows are made of thorns, and the skin is not removed. Lu ordered his disciples to say goodbye: "Don't be arrogant, don't stand upside down, don't speak too much; standing upside down and speaking too much is a regular rank." Xue ordered his disciples to say goodbye: "Don't be arrogant, don't stand upside down, don't speak too much; those who do this will float."
When Yin Zhongkan was the governor of Jingzhou, there was a flood season and he usually ate only five bowls of food, with no other dishes. When rice grains fell on the plate or table, he would pick them up and eat them. Although we want to lead things, we must do so according to their true nature. I always tell my children, "Don't think that I am giving up my former ambitions because I have been appointed to a provincial post. It is not easy for me to be in this position now. Poverty is the norm for scholars. How can I climb the branch and abandon my roots? You should save it!"
Therefore, a gentleman should be cautious and not lose his face in front of others. The king should be polite, and the ministers should be inferior to him. The ministers should be polite, and the scholars should be inferior to him. Etiquette should not be given to common people, and punishment should not be given to ministers. Punishers should not be at the king's side.
When a lord is alive, he does not wear jade. He should tie the jade with his left hand and set it with his right hand. When he is at home, he should set it. When he is in the morning, he should tie the jade with his right hand and wear the jade with his right hand. He must wear jade with his belt, except when he is at a funeral. Wearing jade has teeth; a gentleman does not take off jade without reason, and a gentleman compares virtue to jade. The emperor wears white jade and a black ribbon, dukes wear mountain black jade and a red ribbon, officials wear water blue jade and a pure ribbon, the crown prince wears Yu jade and a red ribbon, and scholars wear 瓀玟 and a 缊 ribbon. Confucius wears an elephant ring five inches long and a red ribbon.
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