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If the eldest son is given a stick, his son will not take the position with the stick. For a wife, if the parents are alive, do not use a stick, do not bow the head. If the mother is alive, do not bow the head. Bowing the head means bowing in the gift. If you disobey the senior official of the princes, you will not return to wear clothes.
In mourning, one should only look at the deceased but not answer; in mourning of the same age, one should answer but not speak; in mourning of the great merit, one should speak but not discuss; in mourning of the minor merit, one should discuss but not enjoy music. This is the expression of grief in speech.
When Yu Zhigong was the governor of Jingzhou, he presented a feather fan to Emperor Wu. Emperor Wu suspected that it was an old item. Liu Shao, the imperial attendant, said: "When the cypress beams and clouds are constructed, the craftsmen are first placed under them; when the pipes and strings are playing, the bells and Kui are the first to hear the sounds. Zhigong presented the fan because it was good, not new." Empress Yu heard this and said: "This person should be by the emperor's side."
Huan Nanjun was summoned to be the prince's groom, and his boat was moored at Dizhu. After Wang Dafu finished, he was a little drunk and went to see Huan. Huan prepared wine, but the king could not drink it cold, so he kept saying to his attendants, "Tell them to warm the wine!" Huan then started to cry and sob, and the king wanted to leave. Huan hid his tears with his handkerchief and said to the king: "It is my family's taboo, what does it have to do with you?" The king sighed and said: "Lingbao came by himself."
During the funeral of Duke Dao, Ji Zhaozi asked Meng Jingzi, "What should the monarch eat?" Jingzi said, "Eating porridge is the most common etiquette in the world. The fact that we three ministers cannot live in the public office has been heard by everyone in the four directions. If I try hard to be poor, then I can do it. Wouldn't it make people suspect that I live in poor conditions without emotion? I will eat."
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