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Zishang did not mourn when his mother died. His disciples asked Zisi, “Did your ancestors mourn their mothers?” He said, “Yes”. “Why did you not let Bai mourn?” Zisi said, “My ancestors did not lose the way; when the way was high, they followed the way; when the way was low, they followed the way. How could Ji do that? Those who marry Ji are Bai’s mother; those who do not marry Ji are not Bai’s mother.” Therefore, the Kong family did not mourn their mothers when their mothers died, starting with Zisi.
General Lu went to Prime Minister Wang to consult on matters, but he would change his mind afterwards. The prince was surprised by this and later asked Lu about it. Lu said: "You are superior to the people and inferior to them. At the time, I didn't know what to say, but later I realized that it was not right."
The husband of the mother and the wife of the uncle, the two wives mourn for each other, but the gentleman did not mention it. Some say that they cook together.
When you first meet a gentleman, you say, "I really want to be known by the general." You cannot get in touch with the master. The enemy says, "I really want to see you." If you rarely meet him, you say, "I have heard of you." If you meet him quickly, you say, "I have seen you every morning and evening." The blind say, "I have heard of you." If someone is in mourning, you say, "I will see you soon." A boy says, "I will listen to the affairs." If you are in mourning for a minister, you say, "I will listen to the servants of the Minister of Education." If the king is going to marry someone else, if the minister gives gold, jade, and other valuables to the king, he says, "Give money for horses to the officials"; the enemy says, "Give gifts to the attendants." If the minister gives a gift to the king, he says, "Give old clothes to the merchant"; the enemy says, "The 襚." If the relatives are brothers, they will not be promoted with the 襚. The minister serves the king.
The hairpin: three feet long, two feet wide at the bottom and one foot wide at the top. It will be five inches above the top, and it will be trimmed with a six-inch jade belt, not five inches below. It is pure and plain, and it is decorated with five colors.
Therefore, the teaching of ritual is subtle, and it can stop evil before it takes shape, making people move towards good and stay away from crimes without knowing it. That is why the ancient kings respected it. The Book of Changes says: "A gentleman should be cautious at the beginning, and the error of a millimeter will lead to a thousand miles." This is what it means.
When marrying a woman to the emperor, it is said to prepare the people; to the king, it is said to prepare wine and liquor; to the minister, it is said to prepare sweeping.
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