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In funerals, we want them to be relaxed; in auspicious events, we want them to be relaxed. Therefore, even if funerals are hasty, they should not be over-ruled; even if auspicious events are delayed, they should not be lazy. Therefore, if you are too noisy, you are wild; if you are too busy, you are a mean person.
Huan Xuanwu was playing Chupu with Yuan Yandao. Yuan Yandao had a disagreement, so Huan Xuanwu threw five pieces of wood at Yuan Yandao with an angry look. Wen Taizhen said: "Seeing Yuan Sheng's anger, I know Yan Zi is noble."
Someone said to Wang Rong: "Ji Yanzu is as outstanding as a wild crane among chickens." Wang Rong replied: "You have not seen his father!"
When the princes send out their wives, the wives will come to their country with the etiquette of wives; when they arrive, they will enter with wives. The messenger was about to order, saying, "My lord is incompetent and cannot serve the altars and ancestral temples. I have sent my envoy to report this to the steward." The host replied, "My lord has already refused to teach me before. I dare not be disrespectful and must wait for your order." The officials laid out the utensils; the host's officials also received them. When the wife left, the husband sent someone to bring her back, saying, "I am incompetent and cannot serve the altars and ancestral temples. I dare not be disrespectful and must wait for your order." The host replied, "My son is unfilial. I dare not avoid punishment. I dare not be disrespectful and must wait for your order." The messenger withdrew, and the host bowed to see him off. If the uncle is alive, he should be called uncle; if the uncle is dead, he should be called brother; if there is no brother, he should be called husband. The host's resignation was, "My son is unfilial." If they were aunts or sisters, they would also be called.
Confucius said: "To bring death to the dead is unkind and cannot be done; to bring life to the dead is ignorant and cannot be done. Therefore, bamboo cannot be used, tiles cannot taste good, wood cannot be cut, zither and qin are stretched but not level, 竽笙 are complete but not harmonious, there are bells and chimes but no bamboo shoots, which are called Ming vessels, which are divine."
Jin Xianwenzi got married, and the Jin officials went to the wedding. Zhang Lao said, "What a beautiful wedding! What a magnificent wedding! Sing here, cry here, and gather the nation here." Wenzi said, "Wu can sing here, cry here, and gather the nation here. This is the key to following the previous officials in the nine capitals." He bowed twice to the north. Gentlemen call him good at chanting and praying.
Liu Yin said to Xie Renzu, "Since I had four friends, my disciples have become closer." He said to Xu Xuandu, "Since I have my reasons, no bad words will reach my ears." Both of them accepted it without resentment.
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