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When a son serves his parents: if he advises them three times but they still don鈥檛 listen, he should cry and follow them. When the king is ill and takes medicine, the minister should taste it first. When a parent is ill and takes medicine, the son should taste it first.
Xu Xuandu said: "In Qin Fu, it is said that 'only those who are extremely refined can analyze the principles with him'. This is Liu Yin; and 'only those who are profound and calm can rest with him'. This is Jian Wen."
When Wang Ziyou went to thank Wan, Lord Lin was already there, looking at him with great respect. The king said, "If Mr. Lin had both his hair and beard intact, would his spirit and appearance be even better than this?" Xie said, "The lips and teeth are interdependent and cannot be separated. What do hair and beard have to do with spirit and appearance?" Mr. Lin was very unhappy. He said: "Today I entrust you two wise men with my seven-foot-tall body."
When Wei Xima was about to cross the river, he looked miserable and said to his attendants, "Seeing this vast expanse of land, I feel overwhelmed with emotions. If I still have feelings, who can stop me from feeling this way?"
Someone asked General Yin Zhongjun: "Why does a general who is about to get a position dream of coffins and utensils, and a general who is about to get wealth dream of feces and dirt?" Yin said: "Officials are originally rotten and smelly, so a general who is about to get a position dreams of coffins and corpses; wealth is originally feces and dirt, so a general who is about to get a position dreams of dirt and dirt." People at that time thought that his name was untrue.
Duke Dao's mother died, and Duke Ai wore mourning clothes. Youruo said, "Is it proper to wear mourning clothes for a concubine?" The Duke said, "How can I do this? The people of Lu married me." Ji Zigao buried his wife and broke into other people's crops. He reported to the emperor, "Please give me a Geng." Zigao said, "Mengshi did not blame me for this, and my friends did not abandon me for this. They thought I was the head of the town. If I buy a way to bury the deceased, it will be difficult for the future to succeed me." For those who have not yet received official salary: if the king gives them gifts, they call them offerings, and if they send them to the king, they call them the widowed king; if they disobey the king and the king dies, they will not mourn for him. The corpse is set up with a few mats. When the crying is over, the taboo is used. When the living affairs are over, the ghost affairs begin to end. When the crying is over, the prime minister holds a wooden bell and orders the palace, "Abandon the old and avoid the new." From the bedroom door to the warehouse door. Two names are not tabooed. The mother of the master is named Zhengzai; if it is Zai, it is not Zheng, and if it is Zheng, it is not Zai. When the army is worried, they cry outside the warehouse door in plain clothes, and do not carry a bag when they go to the carriage. If the room of their ancestors is burned, they cry for three days. Therefore, it is said: "When a new palace is on fire, one should also cry for three days."
When Ying Zhennan was appointed as the governor of Jingzhou, Wang Xiuzai and Qiao Wang Ziwuji went to Xinting together to say goodbye. There were many guests sitting there, and they did not realize that both of them had arrived. A guest said, "The disaster caused by Qiao Wangcheng was not the general's intention, but Pingnan's doing." Wuji took the sword from the direct soldier and wanted to chop him. Xiu Zai tried to jump into the water, but was rescued by someone on the boat.
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
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