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Xu Yuan once visited Jianwen. It was a windy and calm night with a bright moon, so they composed music and talked in the room. Expressing one’s inner thoughts is Xu’s forte. The words are clear and graceful, more than usual. Although Jianwen and he had always been in sync, this encounter was even more regrettable. Unconsciously they knelt down and spoke with their hands, and the conversation lasted until almost dawn. Then he said: "Xuan Du has great talent and sentiment, so it is not easy to give him many compliments."
Jia Chong's wife, Li, wrote a set of instructions for girls, which were circulated in the world. The daughter of Li, the wife of King Xian of Qi, and the daughter of Guo, the empress of Emperor Hui. After Chong died, Li and Guo's daughters each wanted to be buried together with their mother, but they could not decide for years. After Empress Jia was deposed, Lady Li was enshrined in the royal family and the burial was decided.
The teacher's writing brush, zither and harp are in front of you. You sit down and move them, being careful not to cross them. Sit back when you have finished emptying your mind, and sit before you have finished eating. Sit down and be at peace, hold your face. If the elder is not up to standard, do not speak nonsense. Correct your appearance and listen respectfully. Do not suppress opinions and do not copy others. It must be the ancient times, called the former kings. Sitting in the presence of the teacher: the teacher asks me questions, and I answer them in the end. If you ask for work, you will get up. If you ask for advice, you will get up. When my father called me, I did not respond. When my teacher called me, I did not respond. So I just stood up. Sit in front of the one you respect most, and do not sit at any other table. I can't stand seeing the same. When the candles are lit, when the food is served, when the guests come, they stand up. The candle is not visible. Don't scold a dog in front of distinguished guests. Let food be eaten without spitting.
Ziyun: "The etiquette of the guest always advances to show respect, and the funeral etiquette always adds distance." Bathing in the middle stream, eating under the window, small burial inside the door, large burial on the east side, funeral in the guest seat, ancestral worship in the courtyard, burial in the tomb, so as to show distance. The Yin people mourned at the grave, and the Zhou people mourned at home, showing that the people were not rebellious. Ziyun: "Death is the final service of the people, I follow Zhou." Because of this, there are still princes who died without burial. Ziyun: "Ascending from the guest steps, receiving condolences at the guest seat, teaching the people to pursue filial piety." Not calling the king before the death shows that the people are not quarrelsome. Therefore, the "Spring and Autumn Annals" of Lu recorded the funeral of Jin and said: "Kill the son of the king Xiqi and his king Zhuo." Because of this, there are still sons who kill their fathers.
It is better to not be in decline than to be inappropriate. One should not sit at the side in mourning, and one should not serve in service for great achievements.
Liu Gonggan was punished for being disrespectful. Emperor Wen asked him, "Why are you not careful in following the rules?" Zhen replied, "I am indeed mediocre and incompetent, but it is also because Your Majesty has not been thorough in grasping the main points."
Sun Sheng was a military officer in the record room of Yu Gong. He went hunting and took his two sons with him. Yu Gong didn't know this, and suddenly he saw Qi Zhuang in the hunting ground. He was about seven or eight years old. Yu said, "Are you coming again?" He answered immediately, "As the saying goes, 'No matter how small or big, I will follow you.'"
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