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As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
Kong Cheqi had always had the intention of escaping from the world since he was young. It was not until he was over 40 years old that he responded to Andong's order. Before he took up an official post, he often slept alone, sang and played music to teach himself, called himself Kong Lang, and traveled around famous mountains. The people said that he had Taoist magic and built a temple for him. There is still a Confucius Temple today.
Zixia said: "The words are great! Beautiful! Magnificent! Is it all that is said?" Confucius said: "Why is it so? The gentleman's clothes still have five rises." Zixia said: "How is it?" Confucius said: "The music without sound, the spirit and will are not violated; the etiquette without form, the dignity and manners are slow; the mourning without clothes, the inner forgiveness is sad. The music without sound, the spirit and will are obtained; the etiquette without form, the dignity and manners are cautious; the mourning without clothes is applied to the four countries. The music without sound, the spirit and will are in accordance with; the etiquette without form, the upper and lower are in harmony; the mourning without clothes, to keep all nations. The music without sound is heard in all directions every day; the ritual without form is heard day by day; the mourning without mourning clothes is pure virtue and wisdom. The music without sound is aroused; the ritual without form is spread to the four seas; the mourning without mourning clothes is spread to Sun Tzu. "
Wang Dongting was the chief clerk of Huan Xuanwu. After he was loaned the position, he had a good reputation. The Duke really wanted him to become the leader of the prefecture. At first, he saw Xie Shiyi, but he looked calm. The guests sat down and laughed at each other. The Duke said, "No. Judging from his expression, he must be extraordinary. I will give it a try." Later, when the king was lying in ambush under the pavilion during the moonlit night, the Duke rode out from inside and attacked him. Those on both sides fell down, but the king did not move. His reputation and value thus greatly increased, and people all said that he was "a person who can assist the public."
The Buddhist scriptures believe that by cultivating the spirit, one can become a sage. Jian Wen said: "I don't know if I can reach the pinnacle of achievement. However, the merits of training cannot be denied."
A woman shall be buried with her great-grandmother. If there are three great-grandmothers, she shall be buried with the close ones. If the wife is a senior official and dies, and then her husband is no longer a senior official, but is buried with her wife, the sacrifice should not be changed; if the wife dies and then the husband is a senior official, and is buried with his wife, the sacrifice should be that of a senior official. A descendant of a father does not wear mourning clothes for his mother. The reason for not wearing mourning clothes is that the mourner does not offer sacrifices. A woman who is not the master and is caned: the aunt is caned for the husband, and the mother is caned for the eldest son. A daughter's son is in the house for the parents, and the master of the mourning does not wear a cane, then the son alone can be caned.
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