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A gentleman is usually reserved. A gentleman is ashamed to prepare funeral supplies. A gentleman will not do anything that can be prepared in one or two days. In mourning clothes, the sons of brothers are treated as sons, and they should be welcomed and brought forward; the sisters-in-law and uncles have no mourning clothes, and they should be pushed away; the sisters-in-law and sisters are thin, and some people accept me and treat them well. Eating beside a mourning person, I have never been full.
Ruan Xuanzi was cutting down trees on the community site, and someone tried to stop him. Xuan Zi said: "If a community is built on a tree, and the tree is cut down, the community will perish; if a tree is built on a community, and the tree is cut down, the community will move."
The Master said: “A ruler of a country should make clear what is good and what is bad, so as to show the people kindness, and then the people will not be double-minded. The Book of Songs says: ‘Be calm and share your position, and be good at being upright. ’” The Master said: “If the superior is suspicious, the people will be confused; if the subordinate is difficult to know, the ruler will be overworked. Therefore, a ruler who governs the people should make clear what is good to show the people, be careful of what is bad to prevent the people from being licentious, and then the people will not be confused. The ministers should follow the manners, not be heavy-handed, not support what they cannot do, and not bother what they do not know, and then the ruler will not be overworked. The Book of Songs says: ‘The God is strict, and the people are at peace. ’ The Xiaoya says: ‘It is not that they only share, but that the king is in harmony. ’”
The Duke said, “Why don’t gentlemen today practice this?” Confucius said, “Gentlemen today are insatiable in their love of goods, untiring in their indulgence of virtue, idle and arrogant, and are sure to destroy the people. They use the people at noon to attack those who have the Way; they seek what they want, not what they should. In the past, people were used from the front, but now people are used from the back. Gentlemen today do not practice etiquette.”
Prime Minister Wang invited Zu to talk at night and he stayed awake until dawn. There will be guests tomorrow morning. The man has not combed his hair yet and looks a little tired. The guest said, "You were like this yesterday, as if you had insomnia." The Duke said, "I talked a little with the scholar yesterday, and it made me forget my fatigue."
It is said that to govern a country, you must first manage your family. There is no one who cannot teach his family but can teach others. Therefore, a gentleman does not leave home but teaches the country. Filial piety is the way to serve the king; respect for elders is the way to serve the elders; kindness is the way to lead the people. "Kang Gao" said: "It is like protecting a baby. "If you seek it with a sincere heart, even if you don't get it, you won't be far away. There has never been anyone who learned to raise a child before getting married. If one family is benevolent, the whole country will be benevolent; if one family is courteous, the whole country will be courteous; if one person is greedy and violent, the whole country will be in chaos. The mechanism is like this. This is what is meant by one word ruining things, and one person establishing a country. Yao and Shun led the world with benevolence, and the people followed them. Jie and Zhou led the world with violence, and the people followed them. What they ordered was contrary to what the people liked, and the people did not follow them. Therefore, a gentleman should have it in himself before seeking it in others, and not have it in himself before criticizing others. There has never been anyone who can persuade others with what he does not forgive. Therefore, governing a country starts with managing his family. The Book of Songs says, "The peach tree is young and tender, and its leaves are dense. The daughter is married, and she is a good wife." Only when she is a good wife can she teach the people of the country. The Book of Songs says, "Be a good brother and a good younger brother." Only when she is a good brother and a good younger brother can she teach the people of the country. The Book of Songs says, "Its etiquette is not wrong, and it is right for the four countries. ” He who is a father, son, and brother is a model, and then the people can follow it. This is what is meant by governing a country in order to regulate the family.
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