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Zi Yun: "A gentleman forgives his parents' faults and respects their virtues." The Analects says: "If one does not change his father's way for three years, he can be called filial." Gaozong said: "For three years, he did not speak, and he would complain if he spoke." Zi Yun: "If one obeys orders without anger, gives subtle advice without getting tired, and works hard without complaining, he can be called filial." The Book of Poetry
People say that "Yu Wenkang is jade in a good year, and Zhigong is grain in a famine year." Yu Jia Lun says that Wen Kang called "Gong is the grain in a famine year, and Yu Changren is the jade in a good year."
When a senior official came to pay his respects, he would say no. When paying respects to someone, he should not be happy on that day. Women should not go beyond the border to pay respects to someone. On the day of paying respects, they should not drink alcohol or eat meat. When paying respects to a funeral, the person must hold the lead. If they follow the coffin to the grave, they should all hold the rope. When a public official pays respects, there must be someone to bow, even if they are friends or people from the state or village. When paying respects, he should say, "My lord will serve you." The host should say, "Come." When the lord sees the coffin on the road, he must send someone to pay his respects. When a senior official is buried, commoners should not receive his respects. If the brother of the wife's father dies, the son should be the main one, and he should not cry or jump. The husband should enter the room on the right, and have someone stand outside the door to inform the visitors. If they are close to him, he should go in and cry. If the father is alive, he should cry in the wife's room; if they are not the father's descendants, he should cry in other rooms. If there is a funeral, if you hear of the death of a distant brother, you should cry in the side room; if there is no side room, you should cry on the right side of the door; if they are from the same country, you should go to cry.
The Book of Rites says: "A gentleman embraces his grandson but not his son." This means that a grandson can serve as the king's father's corpse, but a son cannot serve as his father's corpse. When a great official sees a corpse of a king, he should bow down. If the king knows why he is preparing a corpse, he should bow down himself, and the corpse must be arranged in a proper manner. The carriage must be on a platform.
The way to display the utensils is to display more and then accept them sparingly; to display sparingly and accept them all is fine. When rushing to the funeral of a brother, first go to the tomb and then the family, and cry for the position. For the funeral of someone you know, cry in the palace and then the tomb. A father shall not be the son of many sons and the outsiders shall be the next. Brothers with princes shall be beheaded. For minor mourning, the belt, hemp and linen shall not be cut off, and the woman shall return to repay the loss.
Whenever Huan Changshi heard people talking about Lord Shen, he would say, "This man has a long-standing reputation, is well-known by our ancestors, and is also a close friend of our ancestors. It is not appropriate to talk about him."
During the time of Duke Ding of Zhulou, someone killed his father. When the officials reported this, the Duke suddenly dropped his seat and said, "This is my fault." He said, "I have learned how to judge this case: if a minister kills the king, all officials will be killed without mercy; if a son kills his father, all palace officials will be killed without mercy. Kill the person, destroy his house, flood his palace and make pigs. It will take more than a month for the king to be promoted."
Wei Zhongjiang was good at calligraphy. Emperor Ming of Wei built a palace and wanted to hang a notice, so he asked General Zhong to climb the ladder and write it. After he died, his hair and temples were all white, so he told his children and grandchildren, "Don't learn to read anymore."
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