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As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
Taifu Xie and Wang Wendu went to see Xi Chao together, but as time went by and Wang had not yet arrived, he wanted to leave. Xie said: "Can't you bear it for a moment for your life?"
The Youyu clan raised the state elders in Shangxiang and raised the common elders in Xiaxiang. The Xiahou clan raised the state elders in Dongxu and raised the common elders in Xixu. The Yin people raised the state elders in Youxue and raised the common elders in Zuoxue. The Zhou people raised the state elders in Dongjiao and raised the common elders in Yuxue: Yuxue was in the western suburbs of the country. The Youyu clan offered sacrifices to the emperor and raised the elderly in deep clothes. The Xiahou clan harvested and offered sacrifices, and provided for the elderly in Yan clothing. The Yin people offered sacrifices in a veil, and provided for the elderly in white clothing. The Zhou people offered sacrifices in a crown, and provided for the elderly in black clothing. All the three kings provided for the elderly according to age. A son of an eighty-year-old man shall not participate in politics, a ninety-year-old man shall not be involved in politics, and a disabled person who is not supported by others shall not participate in politics. In the mourning of parents, there shall be no participation in politics for three years. In the mourning of mourning for the eighth year of ... Father's teeth go with the father, elder brother's teeth go in a line, friends do not exceed each other. Light responsibilities are shared, heavy responsibilities are divided, and gray-haired people are not carried. Gentlemen and old people do not walk alone, and common people and old people do not eat alone.
When the meal is finished, the guest kneels in front and finishes the meal and gives it to the prime minister. The host stands up and says goodbye to the guest, and then the guest sits down. When serving drinks to elders, one must stand up when the wine is served and bow to receive it. The elder said goodbye, and the younger one returned to the table and drank. The elders raised the wine but it was not brewed yet, and the younger ones dared not drink. When elders give gifts, the young and the humble dare not refuse. When fruit is given to the king, those who have seeds should keep the seeds in their pockets. When I serve food to the king, and the king gives me other things, the parts of the vessels that are used to irrigate them do not need to be written, but the rest should be written.
When Sun Xinggong finished writing Tiantai Fu, he showed it to Fan Rongqi and said, "Try throwing it on the ground. It should make the sound of metal and stone." Fan said, "I'm afraid your metal and stone are not the middle tone of Gong Shang!" However, every time he came up with a good line, he would say, "It should be the language of our generation."
Liu Zhenchang and Wang Zhongzu traveled together, and it was late in the day without any food. An acquaintance invited him to dinner, the food was very sumptuous, but he declined it. Zhong Zu said, "It's just to fill my void, why bother to refuse?" Zhen Chang said, "You can't be friends with villains."
Taoist Lin went to see Mr. Xie. He was a child in Dongyang. He had just recovered from an illness and was not yet able to bear the hard work. After discussing with Mr. Lin, they ended up quarreling with each other. His mother, Lady Wang, listened to it from behind the wall, and then sent another letter ordering him to return, but the Grand Tutor kept him. Mrs. Wang then went out and said, "My new wife suffered a family tragedy when she was young. This child is all I have for my life." She burst into tears and took the child home. Mr. Xie said to his companions, "My sister-in-law's speech was so passionate and impressive that it is worthy of being passed down. I regret that I did not allow the officials to see it."
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