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Women's gifts include hazelnuts, dried fruits, dates, and chestnuts.
Ruan Xuanzi often walked, with a hundred coins hanging on the end of his walking stick. When he arrived at a hotel, he would drink heavily alone. Even though he was a noble and powerful person in the time, he refused to go.
People at that time wanted to write a poem about sitting high but failed. Huan Tingwei asked the Duke of Zhou about it, and the Duke of Zhou said, "It can be said to be brilliant." Duke Huan said, "It has a profound spirit."
The Duke said, 鈥淢ay I ask what is meant by completing your body?鈥 Confucius replied, 鈥淣o more than things.鈥 The Duke said, 鈥淢ay I ask what is meant by the way of heaven for a gentleman? 鈥 Confucius replied: 鈥淚t is precious to have 鈥榥ever stop鈥. Just like the sun and the moon follow each other from east to west, it never stops. This is the way of heaven; it does not close for a long time. This is the way of heaven; things are accomplished without action. This is the way of heaven; it is bright after it is accomplished. 鈥 The Duke said: 鈥淚 am stupid and foolish. I am bothering your mind.鈥 Confucius kicked the mat and replied: 鈥淎 benevolent man does not go beyond things, and a filial son does not go beyond things. Therefore, a benevolent man serves his parents as he serves heaven, and serves heaven as he serves his parents. Therefore, a filial son completes himself.鈥 The Duke said: 鈥淣ow that I have heard this, what is the sin in the future?鈥 Confucius replied: 鈥淵our Majesty鈥檚 words are a blessing to me.鈥
The legend says: "There are those who are light and heavy, and the wife of a prince is his aunt. There are those who are heavy and light, and the wife's parents. There are those who are without mourning and with mourning, and the prince's wife is his brother-in-law. There are those who are with mourning and without mourning, and the prince is his wife's parents." The legend says: "When the mother is divorced, the stepmother's party mourning is worn; when the mother dies, the stepmother's party mourning is worn. If the stepmother's party mourning is worn, then the stepmother's party mourning is not worn."
During the three-year mourning period, one should not speak or answer questions. Lu means in the white room, one should not sit with others. In the white room, one should not enter unless it is the right time to see the mother. The elderly should live in the white room and not in the white room. Lu means strict. Wife should be treated as uncles and aunts, aunts and sisters as brothers, and the eldest, middle and youngest as adults. The mourning period for relatives is exempted, and the mourning period for brothers is exempted. The mother and wife of the king should be treated as brothers. Those who show their color should not eat or drink. Apart from the mourning period, when walking on the road, one should be surprised when seeing someone, and surprised when hearing someone鈥檚 name. When visiting the deceased or asking about his illness, one鈥檚 color and expression must be different from others. Only after this can one observe the three-year mourning period. The rest should be done in a straightforward manner.
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