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When Confucius was in Wei, he encountered the funeral of an old abbot. He went in and wept. When he left, he asked Zigong to persuade the charioteer and give him gifts. Zigong said, "I have never persuaded the charioteer for the funeral of my disciple. Is it too much to persuade the charioteer in the old abbot?" The Master said, "My fellow villagers went in and wept, and wept when they met a sad thing. I hate that I have no reason to cry. You should do it." When Confucius was in Wei, there were people attending the funeral, and the Master watched them and said, "How well they conduct the funeral! It is worthy of being a model. You should know it." Zigong said, "What is so good about you, Master?" He said, "When he went, he seemed to be longing, and when he returned, he seemed to be suspicious." Zigong said, "Is it better to return quickly and be anxious?" The Master said, "You know it, but I can't do it." When Yan Yuan died, he presented auspicious meat. Confucius went out to receive it, and then he played the zither and ate it.
When Dai Andao was over ten years old, he painted in Wuguang Temple. When Wang Changshi saw him, he said, "This boy is not only good at painting, but will eventually become famous. I regret that I am old and will not see his prime!"
Zi said: "A gentleman refuses the noble but not the humble, refuses the rich but not the poor, then chaos will be eliminated." Therefore, a gentleman would rather let people float above food than let food float above others. Confucius said: "If you give way to wine, beans and meat and accept the bad, the people will offend the teeth; if you give way to the seat on the lapel and sit down, the people will offend the noble; if you give way to the position in the court and accept the humble, the people will offend the monarch. "The Book of Songs says: "The people are unscrupulous, resenting one another; accepting titles without yielding them, they have finally died." Confucius said: "A gentleman values others and despises himself, and puts others before himself, so the people will yield to him." Therefore, call someone else's ruler "Jun", and call yourself "Guojun". Confucius said: "In the interests of salary, those who die first and those who live later, then the people will not be disloyal; those who die first and those who survive later, then the people can be trusted." The Book of Songs says: "The thoughts of the former rulers were kept by the gullible." With this, the people still disloyalty died and cried without complaint.
When Shi Liu’s mother died, the minister was on the left. When Shi Liu died, his followers were on the right. The minister was on the right because Shi Liu’s followers did it.
Wang Yifu once was assigned to work by a clan member, but he hadn't done anything for some time. When they were having a feast, Wang Yifu said to the clan member, "You are assigned to work for an elder recently, so how can you not do it?" The clan member got very angry and threw a stick in his face. Yi Fu was speechless. After washing up, he took Prime Minister Wang's arm and was carried away together. He looked in the mirror in the carriage and said to the Prime Minister: "The way you look at me is like looking at an ox's back."
Respect, prudence, and correctness before treating each other with affection, is the general principle of etiquette, and it is the way to establish the distinction between men and women, and the righteousness of husband and wife. There is a distinction between men and women, and then there is righteousness between husband and wife; there is righteousness between husband and wife, and then there is affection between father and son; there is affection between father and son, and then there is affection between ruler and minister. Correct. Therefore, it is said that the wedding ceremony is the root of etiquette.
A gentleman has three worries: if he has not heard it, he worries that he will not be able to hear it; if he has heard it, he worries that he will not be able to learn it; if he has learned it, he worries that he will not be able to practice it. A gentleman has five shames: if he is in his position but does not speak the right words, he is ashamed; if he has the right words but does not act the right words, he is ashamed; if he has gained it and then lost it, he is ashamed; if the land is surplus but the people are insufficient, he is ashamed; if the number of people is equal but double, he is ashamed.
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