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Etiquette begins with the coming of age, is based on the wedding, is more important than funerals and sacrifices, is more respected than the morning engagement, and is harmonious with the archery field - this is the general outline of etiquette.
When Ruan Ji's mother died, he enjoyed wine and meat in the presence of King Wen of Jin. Si Li He Zeng was also present and said, "Your Excellency is ruling the world with filial piety, but Ruan Ji is in a state of mourning and is seen drinking and eating meat in front of you. You should exile him overseas to correct the morals." King Wen said, "The successor to the throne is so disgraced, and you cannot share my sorrow. What's the point? Besides, drinking and eating meat when one is ill is a mourning custom!" Ji continued to drink and eat, looking calm.
Hu: The emperor uses ball jade; the princes use elephants; the officials use fish whiskers and bamboo; the scholars use bamboo, elephants are OK. When the emperor and the archer are seen, there is no mention of Hu, but when entering the temple, Hu is mentioned, which is not ancient. Hu is not mentioned for minor achievements, but it is mentioned when the emperor is exempted. After wrapping, one must wash one's face. Even if one holds a hand in the court, one does not wash one's face. When one draws before the emperor, one uses a hu. When one receives an order from the emperor, one writes it on the hu. When the hu is finished, one decorates it. The hu is two feet and six inches long, with a width of three inches in the middle. The hu is six-tenths of the width and one-third of the width.
When Confucius passed by the side of Mount Tai, a woman was crying at a grave. Confucius stood up and listened to her. He asked Zilu to ask her, "Your crying seems to be deeply worried." She said, "Yes, my uncle died of a tiger in the past, my husband also died there, and now my son has died there too." The Master asked, "Why don't you leave?" She said, "No harsh government." The Master said, "My boy, you know it. Harsh government is more fierce than a tiger."
The Master said: “If it is easy for the superiors to do things and easy for the inferiors to understand, then the punishments will not be complicated.” The Master said: “If the virtuous are favored as in the “Black Clothes” and the evil are disliked as in the “Hang Bo”, then the titles will not be disrespected and the people will be willing, and the punishments will not be tested and the people will obey. The Great Odes say: ‘The punishments of King Wen are followed, and the nations will be faithful.’” The Master said: “If the people are taught virtue and regulated by rites, then the people will have a sense of discipline; if they are taught politics and regulated by punishments, then the people will have a sense of evasion. Therefore, if the ruler loves the people, then the people will be close to him; if he is trustworthy, then the people will not betray him; if he is respectful, then the people will have a respectful heart. The Fu Xing says: ‘The people are punished by fate and regulated by punishments. Only the five cruel punishments are called laws. Therefore, the people have bad virtues and are finally exterminated from the world. ’”
When Wang Xiaobo died, his head was hung on a big beam. Sima Taifu ordered his carriage to go out to the mark. When he saw the head of the enemy, he asked, "Why are you so anxious? Do you want to kill me?"
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