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Zeng Zi asked: "After the wedding ceremony, the money is paid and there is an auspicious day, if the girl's parents die, what should be done?" Confucius said: "The husband sends condolences. If the husband's parents die, the girl's family also sends condolences. Father's death is called father, mother's death is called mother. If parents are not alive, uncle's mother is called. After the husband is buried, the husband's uncle tells the girl: 'So-and-so's son has lost his parents, and cannot be a brother, so-and-so tells the girl.' The girl agrees, but dares not marry. This is rite. The husband is exempted from mourning. The girl's parents send people to invite him, but the husband refuses to accept him, and then he marries her. This is rite. If the girl's parents die, the husband also does the same. "
A gentleman acts according to his position and does not want to go beyond it. If you are rich and noble, behave like a rich and noble person; if you are poor and humble, behave like a poor and humble person; if you are a barbarian, behave like a barbarian; if you are in trouble, behave like a barbarian. A gentleman is content with everything he does. If he is in a high position, he will not bully those below him; if he is in a low position, he will not rely on those above him; if he is upright and does not seek help from others, he will not have any complaints. He will not blame the heaven above him, nor will he blame others below him. Therefore, a gentleman lives in ease and waits for his fate. A villain takes risks and hopes for luck. Confucius said, "Shooting is like a gentleman. If he misses the target, he should look for the reason in himself."
Later, when I was young, there were many people who were very knowledgeable. Lord Shen said, "Huang Wen is young, so don't comment on the old scholars. In the past, he had dealings with the two emperors Yuan and Ming, and the two lords Wang and Yu."
A good singer makes people follow his voice; a good teacher makes people follow his will. His words are concise but clear, subtle but good, and rarely use metaphors, which can be called continuing his will.
Emperor Wen of Wei was jealous of his younger brother, Prince of Rencheng, because he was brave and strong. As they were playing Go and eating dates in the presence of Empress Dowager Bian, Emperor Wen put poison in the stems of the dates. He selected the edible ones and presented them to the king, but the king did not understand and mixed them with other foods. Since he was poisoned, the Queen Mother asked for water to save him. The emperor ordered his attendants to destroy the bottles and jars in advance, and the empress dowager ran barefoot to the well, but there was nothing to draw water from. After a while, he died. He wanted to kill Dong'e again, but the Queen Mother said, "You have killed my Rencheng, so you cannot kill my Dong'e again."
"Confucians live with modern people and study with ancient people; they practice what they do in the present and they are regarded as models by future generations; they are not in the right era, and they are not supported by their superiors and pushed by their subordinates. There are people who form a party and endanger them. Their bodies can be endangered, but their will cannot be taken away. Although they live in danger, they still believe in their will and will not forget the people's suffering. Their worries are like this.
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