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When Ruan Ji's mother died, he enjoyed wine and meat in the presence of King Wen of Jin. Si Li He Zeng was also present and said, "Your Excellency is ruling the world with filial piety, but Ruan Ji is in a state of mourning and is seen drinking and eating meat in front of you. You should exile him overseas to correct the morals." King Wen said, "The successor to the throne is so disgraced, and you cannot share my sorrow. What's the point? Besides, drinking and eating meat when one is ill is a mourning custom!" Ji continued to drink and eat, looking calm.
Wang Runan was young and unmarried, so he asked for Hao Pu's daughter. Sikong thought she was stupid and had no place to get married, so he followed her wishes and agreed to her marriage. After marriage, she was indeed beautiful and virtuous. Born in Donghai, she became the mother of Wang. Someone asked Runan how he knew this? He said, "I have seen him fetching water from a well. His movements and bearing were normal and he never offended anyone. I know this from this."
The Master said: "If the ministers are not close to the people, the people are not at peace, then loyalty and respect are insufficient, and wealth and honor are excessive; if the ministers are not governed, the close ministers will be in competition. Therefore, the ministers must be respected, which is the model of the people; the close ministers must be cautious, which is the way of the people. The king should not make small plans for big things, do not talk about the near with the far, and do not make plans for the outside with the inside, then the ministers will not complain, the close ministers will not be angry, and the distant ministers will not be blinded. The Duke of She said in his last words: "Do not ruin big things with small plans, do not anger Queen Zhuang with favorite concubines, and do not anger Zhuangshi, the officials, and the ministers with favorite concubines. '"
From benevolence to relatives, the order is up to the ancestors; from righteousness to ancestors, the order is down to the ancestors. Therefore, the way of human beings is to be close to relatives. Respecting the ancestors means respecting the clan, respecting the clan means gathering the clan, gathering the clan means the ancestral temple is strict, the ancestral temple is strict, the land is valued, the land is valued, the people are loved, loving the people means the punishment is moderate, the punishment is moderate, the people are at peace, the people are at peace, the money is sufficient, the money is sufficient, all the aspirations are fulfilled, all the aspirations are fulfilled, the rituals and customs are followed, and the rituals and customs are followed, and then there is joy. The Book of Songs says: "If you do not show yourself, you will not be disgraced by others." This is what it means.
The king offered five sacrifices to the deceased: the son, the grandson, the great-grandson, the great-great-grandson, and the great-great-grandson. The princes offered three sacrifices, the officials offered two sacrifices, and the suitable scholars and common people offered sacrifices to their sons.
When Xi Jiabin died, his wife's brothers wanted to bring their sister back, but she refused to come. He said: "Even if I cannot live in the same room with Xi Lang, I would rather not be buried in the same grave with him after death!"
You won’t feel full if you eat together, and you won’t get your hands wet if you eat together. Do not knead the rice, do not let the rice fall, do not drink it out of the water, do not chew the food, do not gnaw the bones, do not eat fish or meat, and do not throw bones to dogs. Do not hold on to what you have gained, and do not show off your food. Do not use chopsticks to eat rice and millet. Do not spit on the soup, do not make the soup gurgling, do not prick your teeth, and do not swallow fishy food. The guest was eating soup, but the host could not accept it. The guest drank the meat, and the host declined. Moist meat is chewy, but dry meat is not chewy. Do not suck or roast.
Therefore, the rite of audience is to clarify the righteousness between the monarch and the ministers. The rite of marriage is to make the princes respect each other. The rite of funeral and sacrifice is to clarify the grace of the ministers. The rite of drinking in the village is to clarify the order of the elders and the young. The rite of marriage is to clarify the difference between men and women. Rites are the source of restraint and chaos, just like the source of water in the village. Therefore, those who destroy the old temple because they think it is useless will surely be destroyed by water; those who destroy the old ritual because they think it is useless will surely be destroyed by water.
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