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Etiquette begins with the coming of age, is based on the wedding, is more important than funerals and sacrifices, is more respected than the morning engagement, and is harmonious with the archery field - this is the general outline of etiquette.
Taifu Xie was the horseman of Duke Huan's company. When Duke Huan went to see Xie, Xie was combing his hair and quickly took out his clothes and hat. Duke Huan said, "Why bother with this?" Then they stayed down and talked until nightfall. After he left, he said to his attendants, "Have you ever seen such a person?"
The emperor mourns for seven days and buries in the seventh month. The princes mourn for five days and bury in the fifth month. The officials, scholars and common people mourn for three days and bury in the third month. The three-year mourning period starts from the emperor and ends at the common people. Burial is not stopped because of rain, and no burial is done without a burial or tree. There is no double mourning, from the emperor to the common people. Mourning follows the dead, and sacrifice follows the living. Branch descendants do not offer sacrifices. The emperor has seven temples, three Zhao and three Mu, and the temple of Taizu makes seven. The princes have five temples, two Zhao and two Mu, together with the temple of Taizu, five. The officials have three temples, one Zhao and one Mu, together with the temple of Taizu, three. The scholars have one temple. The common people offer sacrifices in the bedroom.
Duke Xiang of Song buried his wife with a hundred jars of salted meat. Zeng Zi said, "Since it is said that the utensils are clear, it is also filled." At the funeral of Meng Xianzi, Si Tu Lu returned to Si Bu. The Master said, "Yes." Reading the 赐, Zengzi said, "It is not ancient, it is a second report." Cheng Zigao was ill in bed, and Qing Yi came in and asked, "Your illness has worsened. If it becomes a serious illness, what should I do?" Zigao said, "I have heard that life is beneficial to people, and death is not harmful to people. Even if I am not beneficial to people in life, can I harm people in death? When I die, choose a place where no food is eaten and bury me there."
The Master said: “If it is easy for the superiors to do things and easy for the inferiors to understand, then the punishments will not be complicated.” The Master said: “If the virtuous are favored as in the “Black Clothes” and the evil are disliked as in the “Hang Bo”, then the titles will not be disrespected and the people will be willing, and the punishments will not be tested and the people will obey. The Great Odes say: ‘The punishments of King Wen are followed, and the nations will be faithful.’” The Master said: “If the people are taught virtue and regulated by rites, then the people will have a sense of discipline; if they are taught politics and regulated by punishments, then the people will have a sense of evasion. Therefore, if the ruler loves the people, then the people will be close to him; if he is trustworthy, then the people will not betray him; if he is respectful, then the people will have a respectful heart. The Fu Xing says: ‘The people are punished by fate and regulated by punishments. Only the five cruel punishments are called laws. Therefore, the people have bad virtues and are finally exterminated from the world. ’”
An old friend of Confucius was Yuanrang. When his mother died, Confucius helped her wash the coffin. Yuanrang climbed a tree and said, "It has been a long time since I have trusted music." The song went, "The spotted head of a raccoon, holding the curled hand of a woman." Confucius passed by as someone who did not hear it. The follower said, "Can't you stop?" Confucius said, "I have heard that relatives should not lose their relatives, and the old ones should not lose their old ones."
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