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When a relative dies, the chickens and the chickens go barefoot, hold the upper hem, and cry with their hands. The heart of pity and the intention of pain and illness hurt the kidneys, dry the liver and burn the lungs. Water and liquid cannot enter the mouth. No fire is lit for three days, so the neighbors make porridge for him to eat and drink. The grief is in the heart, so the body changes on the outside. The pain and illness are in the heart, so the mouth does not taste good and the body is not comfortable.

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The Master said, "A gentleman does not use words to exhaust people. Therefore, when the world is governed by the Way, then actions have branches and leaves; when the world is not governed by the Way, then words have branches and leaves. Therefore, when a gentleman is at the side of a mourner and cannot give him a gift, he does not ask what he spends; when a sick person is at the side of a mourner and cannot give him a meal, he does not ask what he wants; when a guest is at a guest's house and cannot provide him with a guest, he does not ask where he stays. Therefore, the reception of a gentleman is like water, while that of a villain is like sweet wine; a gentleman is indifferent to success, while a villain is willing to be ruined. Xiaoya says: "A thief's words are sweet, and chaos is caused by glutinous rice." Confucius said: "A gentleman does not praise others with his words, so the people will be loyal. Therefore, a gentleman asks people if they are cold, then he clothes them; asks people if they are hungry, then he feeds them; praises people's beauty, then he gives them a title. Guofeng says: "The heart is worried, so I will go home and be happy." Confucius said: "If the mouth is good but the deeds are not fulfilled, resentment will come to the body. Therefore, a gentleman would rather have resentment than have a promise. Guofeng says: "Talking and laughing slowly, keeping promises, not thinking about the return; if you don't think about the return, what's the point!" Confucius said: "A gentleman does not get close to people with his appearance; if he is distant in affection but close in appearance, is he a thief who robs houses?" Confucius said: "The feelings should be trustworthy, and the words should be clever. ”

The Queen of Desserts

The king creates music when his achievements are accomplished, and establishes rituals when his governance is established. Those who have great achievements have complete music, and those who have a good governance have complete rituals. The dance of Ganqi is not complete music, and those who are prosperous and worship are not complete rituals. The Five Emperors lived in different times, and did not follow each other's music; the Three Kings lived in different times, and did not follow each other's rituals. When music is excessive, it leads to worry, and when rituals are rough, they become biased. And when

Rebirth of the Fair Daughter

When Du Qiao's mother died, there was no one in the palace, thinking it was a traitor. Confucius said, "When she died, she wore lamb fur and black hat, just change it." The Confucius did not mourn for lamb fur and black hat.

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In the Taimiao, there is respect! The king personally leads the sacrifice, and the officials praise and follow. The king personally makes sacrifices, and the lady offers the bowl. The king personally cuts the sacrifice, and the lady offers wine. The ministers and the great officials follow the lord, and the women of the court follow the wives. They are respectful and loyal, and they are eager to receive the feast. The offering of animals is reported in the courtyard, the blood and hair are reported in the room, and the soup is reported in the hall. The three reports are not in the same position, which is probably because they have sought but not obtained them. The sacrifice is set up in the hall, and the sacrifice is made outside, so it is said: "Is it there? Is it here?" One is to offer a pledge, three is to offer a text, five is to offer a review, and seven is to offer a god. The feast is for the king! The three animals, fish and meat are the delicacies of the four seas and nine states; the offerings of the dishes are the harmony of the four seasons. The gold inside is to show harmony. The bundle of silk and the jade disk are to honor virtue. The tortoise is in the front, which is to predict the future. The gold is next, which is to show affection. The red lacquer, silk, bamboo and arrows are to share the wealth with the people. The rest are not regular goods, and each country has what it has, so it is to bring distant things. When it goes out, it is sent in the summer, which is probably a heavy ceremony. Sacrificing to the emperor in the suburbs is the utmost respect. The sacrifice in the ancestral temple is the highest level of benevolence. The funeral is the highest level of loyalty. The preparation of clothing and utensils is the highest level of benevolence. The use of money by guests is the highest level of righteousness. Therefore, if a gentleman wants to observe the way of benevolence and righteousness, etiquette is the root.