丁香社区-黄色笑话

Shameless Big Brother

When Taifu He was the governor of Wu County, he did not go out at first. The powerful families in Wu looked down on him, so they wrote on the gate of the government office: "The chicken of Kuaiji cannot crow." When He heard the news, he left home, looked back at the gate, asked for a pen and wrote: "It cannot crow, kill the Wu child!" Then he went to the various military camps and inspected the various Gu, Lu, and military officials, as well as the hiding and fugitives, and reported everything to the emperor, who punished many people. Lu Kang was the governor of Jiangling at the time, so he petitioned Sun Hao and was released.

Against Love

When the king gives a carriage and horses, ride to pay tribute to the gift; wear clothes to pay tribute to the gift; do not dare to ride or wear without the king's order. When the king gives, bow and place the gift on the ground with your palm; when wine and meat are given, do not bow twice. In all gifts, gentlemen and villains have different days. When offering to the king, the senior officials send the butcher, and the scholars are relatives, all bow twice and bow to send. When serving the king a meal, if there are meat peaches and straw, the straw is removed for the senior officials and the meat is removed for the scholars, and all are done by the butcher. The senior officials do not bow in person, as it is the king's response to themselves. The senior official bowed and gave gifts and left. The scholar waited for the promise and left. He bowed again, but no one bowed in return. The senior official personally gave gifts to the scholar. The scholar bowed and accepted. He bowed again in his room. He did not put on clothes before bowing. When the enemy was not present, he bowed in his room. Whenever he made an offering to a respected person, he did not dare to report it. The scholar did not accept the congratulations of the senior official. The lower official accepted the congratulations of the higher official. When the relatives were present, he addressed the person as father. If someone gave him gifts, he addressed him as father and bowed to him. The ceremony was not grand, and the clothes were not full. Therefore, the fur coat was not covered, and the carriage was not arranged in a proper manner.

Xuanchen Sword God

As a son, you should not live in the main hall, sit in the middle of the seat, walk in the middle of the road, or stand in the middle of the door. Food is not for the sake of abundance, and sacrifice is not for the sake of corpses. Listen to the silent and see the invisible. Do not climb high, do not stand near deep places. Don't criticize carelessly, don't smile carelessly.

The web of fate

　　Zhou Ziju often said: "When I don't see Huang Shudu in the moonlight, my stingy heart has revived."

It's all the son-in-law's fault

When Sun Chuo first wrote Fu Suichu, he built a house by the ditches and rivers, and said that he saw the point of stopping only when he was satisfied. There is a pine tree planted in front of the room, why do I need to dam it myself? Gao Shiyuan was also a neighbor at the time. He said to Sun: "The pine tree is indeed lovely, but it will never be of any use as a pillar of support." Sun said: "Even if the maple and willow trees can be hugged, what good are they?"

Delicate