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Yin Zhongkan's father was ill and suffered from palpitations. He heard ants moving under his bed and thought it was a fight between bulls. Xiaowu did not know that it was the Duke of Yin, so he asked Zhongkan, "Is there a Yin who is so sick?" Zhongkan burst into tears and stood up, saying, "I only know how to advance and retreat."
The sacrifice to the king's father is called Huangzukao, and the king's mother is called Huangzubi. The father is called Huangkao, and the mother is called Huangbi. The husband is called Huangbi. When alive, they are called father, mother, and wife. When dead, they are called father, mother-in-law, and concubine.
When serving a gentleman, the gentleman yawned and stretched himself, picked up his walking stick and shoes, and saw that the sun was setting. The attendant then asked to leave. When sitting in the presence of a gentleman, if the gentleman asks about the affairs of the day, the gentleman should stand up and answer. When one is sitting in the presence of a gentleman, if someone comes and says, "A moment," hoping to hear back, one should stand aside and wait. Do not listen sideways, do not respond loudly, do not look lustfully, and do not be lazy. When walking, do not be arrogant; when standing, do not limp; when sitting, do not spread your legs; when sleeping, do not lie prone. Keep your hair down and don't take off your hat. Don't expose your clothes when you are tired. Don't lift your skirt in the heat.
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
Ruan Xuanzi often walked, with a hundred coins hanging on the end of his walking stick. When he arrived at a hotel, he would drink heavily alone. Even though he was a noble and powerful person in the time, he refused to go.
The Master said: "Foolish and self-righteous, lowly and self-centered, born in this world, go against the ancient ways: such people will bring disaster to themselves." If you are not the Son of Heaven, you cannot discuss rituals, establish systems, or examine texts. Today, the world has the same track for vehicles, the same writing, and the same ethics. Even if you have the position, if you do not have the virtue, you dare not create rituals and music; even if you have the virtue, if you do not have the position, you dare not create rituals and music. Confucius said: "I explained the Xia rituals, but Qi was not enough to prove it. I learned the Yin rituals, and Song still has them. I learned the Zhou rituals, and now I use them, so I follow Zhou."
Xie Zhonglang said: "Wang Xiuzai's joyful nature comes from his family tradition."
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