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When serving food to elders, if the host serves the food personally, then one should bow before eating; if the host does not serve the food personally, then one should eat without bowing.
Wang Sizhou sat with Xie Gong and chanted "I enter without speaking and leave without saying goodbye, I ride on the returning wind and carry the cloud flag." He said to someone, "At that time, I realized that there was no one sitting there."
If it is abolished, there will be chaos. Therefore, if the ritual of marriage is abolished, the relationship between husband and wife will be difficult, and there will be many crimes of adultery and perversion. If the ritual of drinking in the village is abolished, the order of seniority will be lost, and there will be many cases of fighting. If the ritual of funeral and sacrifice is abolished, the grace of ministers will be weak, and there will be many people who forget their lives. If the ritual of marriage is abolished, the position of the monarch and the minister will be lost, the princes will do evil, and the failure of rebellion and aggression will arise.
Gu Sikong did not know his name, so he went to see Prime Minister Wang. Prime Minister Xiao Ji was tired of it. Gu thought about why he had to ask for his advice, and said to his companions, "I have often heard that Yuan Gongdao assisted Zhongzong and protected Jiangbei. He was a little uneasy, which made people gasp." The Prime Minister realized this and said to Gu, "This boy is very smart and sharp."
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
During the funeral of Confucius, two or three disciples all wore mourning clothes and went out. They wore mourning clothes when they were in a group, but not when they went out.
After Yin Zhongkan passed away, Huan Xuan asked Zhongwen, "What kind of person was your Zhongkan?" Zhongwen said, "Although he could not bring glory to the world, he was able to shine through the nine springs."
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