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During the time of Lord Xie, many soldiers fled and most of them escaped to Nantang and boarded the boats. Some people wanted to search for them at a certain time, but Xie Gong refused, saying, "If we don't allow these people to stay, how can we build a capital city?"
If it is abolished, there will be chaos. Therefore, if the ritual of marriage is abolished, the relationship between husband and wife will be difficult, and there will be many crimes of adultery and perversion. If the ritual of drinking in the village is abolished, the order of seniority will be lost, and there will be many cases of fighting. If the ritual of funeral and sacrifice is abolished, the grace of ministers will be weak, and there will be many people who forget their lives. If the ritual of marriage is abolished, the position of the monarch and the minister will be lost, the princes will do evil, and the failure of rebellion and aggression will arise.
Yin Zhongjun was dismissed and lived in Xin'an, where he wrote on the air all day long. The officials and people of Yangzhou chased him out for justice, and secretly watched him, and saw only the four words "a very strange thing" written on his face.
Yang Sui's second son, Fu, was a talented young man. He was good friends with Xie Yishou and once went to Xie Yishou early in the morning to pay his respects, but had not yet eaten. Soon Wang Qi and Wang Du came. Since they had not known each other before, the king showed displeasure at the banquet and wanted to ask Yang to leave. The sheep did not look around, but only rested his feet on the table, looking around calmly. After Xie exchanged a few words with Wang, he turned to talk about the appreciation with Yang. Wang then realized what was so special and they joined him in talking. Soon the food was eaten, and the two kings were unable to eat, except for the sheep. The sheep did not respond much, but ate heartily, and then left after eating. Then he tried hard to keep him, but Yang Yi refused to stay and said, "I couldn't obey your order before, and China is still empty." The two kings were the two younger brothers of Xiaobo.
Zeng Zi asked: "After the wedding ceremony, the money is paid and there is an auspicious day, if the girl's parents die, what should be done?" Confucius said: "The husband sends condolences. If the husband's parents die, the girl's family also sends condolences. Father's death is called father, mother's death is called mother. If parents are not alive, uncle's mother is called. After the husband is buried, the husband's uncle tells the girl: 'So-and-so's son has lost his parents, and cannot be a brother, so-and-so tells the girl.' The girl agrees, but dares not marry. This is rite. The husband is exempted from mourning. The girl's parents send people to invite him, but the husband refuses to accept him, and then he marries her. This is rite. If the girl's parents die, the husband also does the same. "
When Wei Si Tu Jingzi died, Zixia offered condolences. The host had not yet buried him, so he went there in mourning clothes. Ziyou went to mourn. After the host had buried him, Ziyou came out, wearing mourning clothes and crying. Zixia asked, "Did you hear that?" He said, "I heard from you, Master, that if the host has not changed his clothes, he should not wear mourning clothes." Zengzi said, "Yanzi can be said to know etiquette, and he is respectful." Youruo said, "Yanzi wore the same fox fur coat for thirty years, and sent one carriage to the tomb and returned; the king had seven carriages, and the ministers had five carriages. How could Yanzi know etiquette?" Zengzi said, "If a country is not governed by the Way, a gentleman will be ashamed to be full of etiquette. If the state is extravagant, then show it frugality; if the state is frugal, then show it etiquette.
During the funeral of Duke Dao, Ji Zhaozi asked Meng Jingzi, "What should the monarch eat?" Jingzi said, "Eating porridge is the most common etiquette in the world. The fact that we three ministers cannot live in the public office has been heard by everyone in the four directions. If I try hard to be poor, then I can do it. Wouldn't it make people suspect that I live in poor conditions without emotion? I will eat."
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