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As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
Wang Taiwei said: "Guo Zixuan's words and opinions are like flowing water, which never runs dry."
Duke Zhuang of Lu and the people of Song fought at Chengqiu. Xian Benfu drove the chariot, and Bu Guo was on the right. The horses were frightened and defeated, and the Duke's army was in retreat. The assistant charioteer gave reins. The Duke said, "It's the last divination." Xian Benfu said, "You won't be defeated in the future, but you are defeated now. You are not brave." So he died. The groom was bathing the horse, and a stray arrow hit the white flesh. The Duke said, "It's not his fault." So he wrote a eulogy for him. The scholars started to write eulogies from this time.
Meng Wannian and his younger brother were orphaned at a young age and lived in Yangxin County, Wuchang. Wannian traveled around and was famous in his time, but he was orphaned and had never left the house. People in the capital wanted to see him, so they sent a letter to the orphan, saying, "My brother is seriously ill." Arrived in the capital in a panic. All the wise men of the time who saw him sighed and said to each other, "If a young orphan is like this, he will die in ten thousand years."
In ancient times, the seams of the hat were shrunk, but now, the seams are horizontal; so the hat of mourning is auspicious, which is not the ancient way. Zengzi said to Zisi: "Ji! When I was in mourning for my parents, I did not drink water for seven days." Zisi said: "The ancient kings established the rituals, those who passed by should bow down to reach it, and those who did not reach it should stand on tiptoe to reach it. Therefore, when a gentleman is in mourning for his parents, he should not drink water for three days, and he can only stand up after being caned." Zengzi said: "If small merits are not taxed, then distant brothers will never mourn, is that right?"
A filial son will not obey the dark, will not take on dangerous tasks, for fear of humiliating his parents. While parents are alive, do not allow friends to die. No private property.
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