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Huan Xuan asked Liu Taichang, "How am I compared to Xie Taifu?" Liu replied, "You are noble, while Taifu is profound." He asked again, "How am I compared to my virtuous uncle Zijing?" Liu replied, "Hawthorn, pear, orange, and grapefruit each have their own merits."
The emperor's wife is called the queen, the princes are called the lady, the great officials are called the young lady, the scholars are called the woman, and the common people are called the wife.
When the general Wang came down, Duke Yu asked, "You have four friends, who are they?" They replied, "Your family's Zhonglang, my family's Taiwei, A Ping, and Hu Wu Yanguo. Therefore A Ping should be the worst." Yu said, "It seems he is not willing to be inferior." Yu asked again, "Who is on his right?" The king said, "There is someone." He asked again, "Who is it?" The king said, "Ah! He has his own opinion." The people on both sides urged the duke to stop.
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
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