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A gentleman has three worries: if he has not heard it, he worries that he will not be able to hear it; if he has heard it, he worries that he will not be able to learn it; if he has learned it, he worries that he will not be able to practice it. A gentleman has five shames: if he is in his position but does not speak the right words, he is ashamed; if he has the right words but does not act the right words, he is ashamed; if he has gained it and then lost it, he is ashamed; if the land is surplus but the people are insufficient, he is ashamed; if the number of people is equal but double, he is ashamed.
During the death of Duke Kao of Zhulou, Lord Xu sent Rongju to offer condolences to Han, saying: "My lord sent Rongju to sit with Han and present the Marquis' jade. He sent Rongju to Han." The officials said: "The princes who come to humiliate my city are easy to easy and easy to be mixed. There has never been one who is easy to be mixed." Rongju replied: "Rongju heard that serving the lord should not forget his lord, nor should he forget his ancestors. In the past, my ancestor King Ju went west to fight and crossed the river, and he did not follow this saying. Rongju, a Lu man, dare not forget his ancestors."
When Ruan Ji's mother died, he enjoyed wine and meat in the presence of King Wen of Jin. Si Li He Zeng was also present and said, "Your Excellency is ruling the world with filial piety, but Ruan Ji is in a state of mourning and is seen drinking and eating meat in front of you. You should exile him overseas to correct the morals." King Wen said, "The successor to the throne is so disgraced, and you cannot share my sorrow. What's the point? Besides, drinking and eating meat when one is ill is a mourning custom!" Ji continued to drink and eat, looking calm.
When Lezheng Zichun's mother died, he did not eat for five days. He said, "I regret it. Since my mother didn't know my feelings, how can I use my feelings!"
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