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General Yu looked at Zhonglang Yu and said: "I came from home and talked with him."
When Du Qiao's mother died, there was no one in the palace, thinking it was a traitor. Confucius said, "When she died, she wore lamb fur and black hat, just change it." The Confucius did not mourn for lamb fur and black hat.
When the dukes met before the appointed time, it was called "yu", and when they met in the land, it was called "hui". When the dukes sent officials to ask the dukes, it was called "pin", when they made promises, it was called "shi", and when they attended the sacrifice, it was called "meng".
When Huan Nanjun was a child, he and his brothers raised geese and fought together. The geese in Nanjun were always inferior to him, and he was very angry. That night he went to the goose pen, took all the brothers' geese and killed them. At dawn, all the family members were frightened, thinking it was a strange thing, and they rode in a white carriage. The cavalry said, "There is nothing to be surprised about. It must be a joke from Nanjun!" When asked, it turned out to be true.
The Duke said, “Why don’t gentlemen today practice this?” Confucius said, “Gentlemen today are insatiable in their love of goods, untiring in their indulgence of virtue, idle and arrogant, and are sure to destroy the people. They use the people at noon to attack those who have the Way; they seek what they want, not what they should. In the past, people were used from the front, but now people are used from the back. Gentlemen today do not practice etiquette.”
Zeng Zi asked: "What should be done if there is a funeral? What comes first and what comes later?" Confucius said: "In the funeral, the light is first and then the heavy; the offering is first and then the light; it is a ritual. From the beginning to the funeral, there is no offering, and there is no mourning during the funeral; after the funeral, there is an offering, and then say goodbye to the funeral, and then do the funeral. The funeral is first heavy and then light, which is a ritual." Confucius said: "Even if the son of the clan is seventy, there is no one without a mistress; if he is not a son of the clan, it is okay even if he has no mistress."
There was a man named Zhou Feng in Lu. Duke Ai held a seal and asked to see him, but he said no. The Duke said, "I'll stop!" He sent someone to ask him, "The Yu clan did not show trust to the people, but the people trusted them; the Xia clan did not show respect to the people, but the people respected them. How did they get this from the people?" He replied, "In the ruins and tombs, they did not show grief to the people, but the people mourned; in the altars and ancestral temples, they did not show respect to the people, but the people respected them. The Yin people made an oath, but the people began to rebel; the Zhou people made a meeting, but the people began to doubt. If there is no courtesy, righteousness, loyalty, sincerity and honesty to govern them, even if they are firmly united, will the people not break away?"
The Master said: "What is etiquette? It is the management of affairs. The gentleman has his affairs, and he must manage them. To govern the country without etiquette is like a blind man without friends. What can the entourage do? It is like someone who seeks in a dark room all night, how can he see without a candle? If there is no etiquette, then the hands and feet will not be able to move, the ears and eyes will not be able to add, and the advance and retreat, bowing and yielding will not be controlled. Therefore, if it is used in the residence, the elder and the younger will lose their distinction; the boudoir and the three clans will lose their harmony; the court and the official titles will lose their order; hunting and military affairs will lose their strategies; the army and military achievements will lose their rules; the palace will lose its measure; the tripod will lose its image; the food will lose its time; the music will lose its mode; the car will lose its style; the ghosts and gods will lose their feast; the funeral will lose its sorrow; the debate will lose its party; the official will lose its form; the government affairs will lose its implementation; it will be imposed on the body and mishandled in front, and all the actions of the crowd will lose their appropriateness. In this way, there is no way to reconcile with the crowd. ”
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