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Six rituals: capping, marriage, mourning, sacrifice, hometown, and meeting. Seven teachings: father and son, brothers, husband and wife, monarch and minister, elder and younger, friends, and guests. Eight policies: food, clothing, work, differences, measurement, quantity, number, and system.
Sun Changle wrote Wang Chang's history and said, "I and my husband are not snobbish in their dealings, their hearts are like clear water, and they have the same mysterious taste."
Wang Ningzhi thanked his wife for going to the Wang family and looked down upon him. Now that I have returned to the Xie family, I feel very sorry for you. The Grand Tutor comforted him and said, "Wang Lang is the son of Yi Shao. He is not a bad person. Why do you hate him?" He replied, "Among my uncles, there are A Da and Zhong Lang. Among my brothers, there are Feng, Hu, E and Mo. I never expected that there would be Wang Lang in this world!"
Huan Shiqian was the eldest son of Sikong Huo. The nickname is Zhen E. When he was seventeen or eighteen years old, he had not been promoted yet, but the young servants already called him "Zhen'e Lang". He once lived in Xuanwuzhaitou. During the expedition to Fangtou, the chariots and cavalry overwhelmed the enemy, and no one on the left or right was able to rescue them. Xuanwu said to him, "Did you know that your uncle fell into the hands of the bandits?" Shi Qian was very excited when he heard this. He ordered Zhu Pi to be his deputy, and he rode his horse among tens of thousands of people. No one could resist him, and he rushed back directly, which impressed the three armies. Later, Heshuo used this name to cure malaria.
When Ruan Bubing lost his mother, Pei Linggong went to offer condolences. Ruan Fang was drunk, sat on the bed with his hair loose, and did not cry. Pei arrived, sat on the ground, cried and mourned, and then left. Someone asked Pei, "In a condolence ceremony, the host cries and the guests perform the rituals. Since Ruan didn't cry, why did you cry?" Pei said, "Ruan is an outsider, so he doesn't respect rituals. We are ordinary people, so we take rituals as our own." People at that time sighed that he had achieved the best of both worlds.
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
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