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As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
Chen Zhongju once sighed and said: "People like Zhou Ziju are truly capable of governing a country. If compared to a precious sword, he is the best of the world."
Zilu said, "How sad it is to be poor! There is nothing to take care of him when he is alive, and nothing to do with his death." Confucius said, "To eat beans and drink water to the fullest is filial piety; to hide one's head and body, to return to bury without a coffin, and to weigh the property is courtesy."
He Yan was the Minister of Personnel and held a prestigious position. His room was always filled with guests for conversation. Wang Bi, who was not yet twenty years old, went to see him. Yan heard of Bi's name, so he cited the superior theory of the previous one and said to Bi: "I think this theory is the best, can you challenge it again?" Bi then challenged, and everyone in the room thought he was inferior. So Bi acted as the host and the guest several times, but each time he was better than others.
At the beginning of the university's teaching, the students wore leather caps and offered food as sacrifices to show respect for the way; the Xiaoya said that the students were taught at the beginning of the three years; they beat drums and boxes when they entered school to show their knowledge; the two things in summer and Chu were used to collect their power; they did not visit the school before the sacrifice to encourage their aspirations; they observed from time to time but did not speak to keep their minds; the young listened but did not ask questions, and did not skip grades in learning. These seven are the great principles of education. The Records says: "All students should first study, and scholars should first have ambitions." Is this what it means!
When Kong Junping was seriously ill, Yu Sikong was sent to Kuaiji to visit him. He asked him about his condition and even shed tears. After Yu got off the bed, Kong said with a sigh: "A real man is about to die, but instead of asking about the way to keep the country and the family safe, he pretends to be a child and asks!" When Yu heard this, he thanked him and asked him to talk.
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