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Men and women do not know each other without a matchmaker; they do not interact or get close to each other without money. Therefore, the sun and the moon are used to inform the king, and all warnings are used to inform the ghosts and gods. Wine and food are prepared to invite neighbors and colleagues to show their respect.
When Xiahou Xuan was put in shackles, Zhong Yu was appointed as the Minister of Justice. Zhong Hui, who did not know Xuan at first, became close to him. Xuan said, "Although I am a survivor of torture, I dare not obey your order!" He said nothing during the interrogation at first, but his expression did not change when he was about to be executed in the East Market.
When Xie Yi was the magistrate of Shan, an old man broke the law, so Xie punished him by giving him strong liquor, even until he was drunk, but he was still not satisfied. The Taifu was seven or eight years old at the time. He was wearing blue cloth trousers and sitting beside his brother's knees. He advised him, "Brother! The old man is pitiful. Why do you do this?" Yi then changed his expression and said, "Anu, do you want to let him go?" Then he sent him away.
Meng Jia of Wuchang was an official of Yu Taiwei and was already well-known. Taifu Zhu had the ability to judge people. After leaving Yuzhang, he returned and passed by Wuchang. He asked Yu, "I heard that Meng Congshi is good. Is he here now?" Yu said, "You can go and find him yourself." Zhu stared at him for a long time, pointed at Jia and said, "This man is a little different. Could he be the right one?" Yu laughed and said, "Yes!" At that time, he admired Zhu's insight and was also happy that Jia appreciated him.
The Duke said, “May I ask what is meant by respecting oneself?” Confucius replied, “When a gentleman speaks too much, the people will make excuses; when he acts too much, the people will make examples. If a gentleman does not speak too much and does not act too much, the people will respect him without being ordered. In this way, he can respect himself; if he can respect himself, he can complete his parents. ”The Duke said, “May I ask what is meant by completing his parents?” Confucius replied, “A gentleman is a name for people. The people call him a son of a gentleman. This is to make their parents become gentlemen, and this is to complete their parents’ name!” Confucius then said, “In ancient times, the most important thing in governing was to love people. If you cannot love people, you cannot have your body; if you cannot have your body, you cannot be at peace with your land; if you cannot be at peace with your land, you cannot be happy with heaven; if you cannot be happy with heaven, you cannot complete your body.”
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