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Zeng Zi asked, "When a envoy dies in his residence, etiquette says: public residences are restored, but private residences are not restored. In all countries where envoys are granted residences by officials, public residences are already public residences, so why do you say that private residences are not restored?" Confucius said, "What a good question! The homes of ministers, officials, and scholars are called private residences; public residences and official residences are called public residences. The restoration of public residences is what it means." Zeng Zi asked, "The lower dead: Tu Zhou buried in the garden, and then went there by carriage, because the road was close. Now the tomb is far away, how should it be buried?" Confucius said, "I heard Lao Dan say: In the past, Shi Yi had a son who died, which was the lower dead. The tomb was far away, and Zhao Gong asked him, 'Why don't you bury him in the palace? ' Shi Yi said, 'How dare I? ’ Duke Zhao told Duke Zhou about this, and Duke Zhou said, ‘Is it not possible?’ Shi Yi did it. The use of coffins and coffins for the deceased was first introduced by Shi Yi.
The gentleman said: "Gently accept harmony, and accept white; loyal and faithful people can learn etiquette. If there is no loyal and faithful person, etiquette will not be in vain. Therefore, it is precious to get the right person. Confucius said: "Reciting three hundred poems in the Book of Songs is not enough for one offering. The ceremony of one offering is not enough for a great feast. The ceremony of a great feast is not enough for a great group. The great group is ready, but it is not enough for the feast of the emperor." Don't discuss etiquette lightly! Zilu was the chief of Ji's family. Ji's family offered sacrifices at dusk, and when the day was not enough, they continued with candles. Even if there is a strong face and a solemn and respectful heart, they are all tired. The officials limped and leaned to attend the sacrifice, which was a great disrespect. On other days when offering sacrifices, Zilu would be present. The affairs of the inner room would be handled at the door, and the affairs of the hall would be handled at the steps. They would start their activities at dawn and leave at dusk. Confucius heard this and said, "Who says that You doesn't know etiquette?
Liu Ling was drunk and very thirsty, so he asked his wife for wine. The woman threw away the wine and destroyed the utensils, and wept and advised, "You drink too much. It is not the way to keep healthy. You must stop drinking!" The actor said, "Very good. I cannot control myself. I can only pray to the gods and ghosts and swear to stop. Now you can prepare the wine and meat." The woman said, "I respectfully obey your command." She offered wine and meat to the gods and asked the actor to swear. Ling knelt down and made a wish, "Liu Ling was born with wine as his name. I can drink one hu of wine at a time, and five dou of wine will sober me up. Don't listen to women's words." He then served wine and meat, and he was already drunk.
Wang Ziyou and Zijing were both seriously ill, but Zijing died first. Ziyou asked his attendants, "Why haven't we heard any news? He is already dead!" He showed no sadness at all when he spoke. They asked for a sedan chair and came to the funeral, but did not cry. Zijing had always loved the zither, so he went straight in and sat on the coffin, took out Zijing's zither and played it. When the strings were out of tune, he threw it to the ground and said, "Zijing! Zijing! Both you and the zither are gone." He was in grief for a long time, and died more than a month later.
The so-called self-cultivation is to regulate one's family. One should avoid what one loves, avoid what one despises, avoid what one fears, avoid what one pities, and avoid what one is lazy about. Therefore, there are few people in the world who know the evil of what one likes and the beauty of what one hates. Therefore, there is a proverb: "No one knows the evil of his son, and no one knows the greatness of his seedling. "This means that if you do not cultivate yourself, you cannot manage your family.
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