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When Lady Xie was teaching her son, she asked the tutor, "How come I didn't see you teaching my son for the first time?" The tutor replied, "I always teach my son myself."
Confucian scholars dress moderately, move cautiously, show slowness when they are big and false when they are small, show authority when they are big and shame when they are small, and they are difficult to advance and easy to retreat, and they are like incompetent. Their appearance is like this.
After Emperor Yuan ascended the throne, because of the favor of Queen Zheng, he wanted to abandon Emperor Ming and enthrone Emperor Jianwen. Those who discussed the issue at that time all said, "It is not only against reason and ethics to abandon the elder and establish the younger one as the crown prince, but also because Emperor Ming is intelligent and decisive, he should be the crown prince." The officials of Zhou and Wang all argued earnestly. Only Diao Xuanliang wanted to obey the young master and follow the emperor's orders. Emperor Yuan was about to implement it, but was worried that the officials would not obey his orders. So he first summoned Marquis Zhou and the Prime Minister, and then wanted to issue an edict to Diao. When Zhou and Wang had just entered and reached the top of the steps, the emperor sent someone to convey the imperial edict and stopped the envoys from going to the east wing. The Marquis of Zhou did not realize what was happening, and immediately went down the stairs. The prime minister opened the imperial edict and went straight to the emperor's bed and said, "I don't know why Your Majesty sees me." The emperor remained silent, took out the yellow paper edict from his arms, tore it up and threw it at him. From then on, the crown prince was decided. Zhou Houfang sighed with shame and said, "I always said I was better than Maohong, but now I know I am not as good as him!"
When a girl is betrothed, she is given a tassel; unless there is a serious reason, she will not enter the bride's house. When aunts, sisters, and daughters return home after getting married, brothers should not sit at the same table with them, nor eat from the same utensils with them. Father and son sit at different tables.
Zhou Boren was the Minister of Personnel. He fell seriously ill at night in the province. At that time, Diao Xuanliang was the Minister of the Chancellery, and he rescued Bei and was very close to him. After a long time, there was a small loss. The next morning, Zhongzhi was informed and he came in a panic. As soon as he entered the house, Diao got out of bed and burst into tears, telling him about Boren's critical condition yesterday. Zhongzhi wrote on it by hand, and Diao made a copy of it and placed it beside the door. When he came forward, he did not even ask about the illness, but simply said, "You were a famous person in the Central Court, and you were as famous as He Changyu. How could you have any relationship with such a flatterer as Diao Xie?" Then he left.
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