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When judging a person, he must be of the same rank.
When Xi Jiabin died, his wife's brothers wanted to bring their sister back, but she refused to come. He said: "Even if I cannot live in the same room with Xi Lang, I would rather not be buried in the same grave with him after death!"
Fu Qian was already well versed in the Spring and Autumn Annals and was about to write a note on it, wanting to refer to similarities and differences. He heard that Cui Lie had gathered his disciples to lecture on the Spring and Autumn Annals, so he hid his name and was hired out to Lie's disciples to work for a living. Whenever he was talking, he would eavesdrop on what was happening behind the door. Knowing that no one can surpass myself, I discuss my strengths and weaknesses with other students. Lie Wen was surprised and didn't know who he was, but he had heard of Qian's name and was suspicious of him. He went there early in the morning, and before he woke up, he called out, "Zi Shen! Zi Shen!" Qian was startled and responded, and they then became friends.
The guest must face south. The east is spring, and spring means stupidity, and the one who produces all things is the saint. The south is summer, and summer means borrowing. To nurture, grow, and borrow is benevolence. The west is autumn, and autumn means sorrow. To be sad with time is to observe and keep righteousness. The north is winter, and winter means the middle, and the middle is to hide. Therefore, when the emperor is established, the left is the saint and the right is the benevolent, and the right is the righteousness and the hidden. The host must face east, which is the host and the guest. The host must live in the east, and the east is spring, and spring means stupidity, and the one who produces all things; the host creates it, and the one who produces all things. The moon is formed in three days, and the three months are formed in time. Therefore, there are three concessions in etiquette, and three ministers must be established when a country is established. The three guests are the foundation of politics and education, and the great reference of etiquette.
Bo Gao died in Wei and went to Confucius. Confucius said: "Why should I cry? For my brothers, I cry in the temple; for my father's friends, I cry outside the temple gate; for my teacher, I cry in the bedroom; for my friends, I cry outside the bedroom door; for my acquaintances, I cry in the wild. In the wild, it is already distant; in the bedroom, it is already important. Since You Ci came to see me, I cried to Ci's family." Then he ordered Zigong to be the host and said: "If you come to cry for you, bow to him; if you know that Bo Gao came, don't bow."
At the beginning of death, he was full as if he had no end; after the funeral, he was as if he was looking for something but couldn't get it; after the burial, he was as if he was looking for something but couldn't get it. He was trained and sighed, auspicious and vast. Zhulou shot arrows at him again, probably since the battle at Shengxing. The women of Lu who wore their hair in a bun and mourned started from the defeat at the Taiyu.
The way of a gentleman is like starting from near when he wants to go far, and starting from low when he wants to climb high. The Book of Songs says: "Wife and wife are in harmony, like playing the harp and the lyre. Brothers are in harmony, and they are happy and indulgent. Be good to your family, and enjoy your wife and money." Confucius said: "Parents are obedient!"
Zishang did not mourn when his mother died. His disciples asked Zisi, “Did your ancestors mourn their mothers?” He said, “Yes”. “Why did you not let Bai mourn?” Zisi said, “My ancestors did not lose the way; when the way was high, they followed the way; when the way was low, they followed the way. How could Ji do that? Those who marry Ji are Bai’s mother; those who do not marry Ji are not Bai’s mother.” Therefore, the Kong family did not mourn their mothers when their mothers died, starting with Zisi.
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