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A gentleman knows the difficulty and ease of learning, and knows its beauty and ugliness, and then he can make extensive metaphors; if he can make extensive metaphors, he can be a teacher; if he can be a teacher, he can be a leader; if he can be a leader, he can be a king. Therefore, a teacher is for learning to be a king. Therefore, choosing a teacher must be careful. "Records" said: "Three kings and four generations only have their teachers." Is this what it means!
Yuan Hu and Fu Tao were both in the palace of Duke Huan. Every time Duke Huan visited Yan, he ordered Yuan and Fu. Yuan was very ashamed of him.
Therefore, only after the behaviors of filial piety, brotherhood, loyalty and obedience are established, can one be a man; only after being a man can one govern others. Therefore, the sage kings valued etiquette. Therefore, it is said that the cap is the beginning of etiquette and the most important thing for good things. Therefore, the ancients valued the cap; the cap was performed in the temple; the temple was performed to respect things; respect things and dare not take the initiative to do things; do not take the initiative to do things, so they humble themselves and respect the ancestors.
When Zhong Hui finished writing four books of essays, he really wanted to let Ji Gong see them. He placed it in his arms, and when he was ready, he was afraid of the difficulty, so he dared not take it out. He threw it far away outside the door and then turned around and ran away.
Han Shou was handsome, so Jia Chong appointed him as an official. Whenever Chong had a party, Jia's daughter would look through the green jade and see Shou, and she would be attracted by him. Always keep your thoughts in mind and express them in poetry. Later, the maid went to Shou's house and told him everything, and also said that the girl was radiant and beautiful. Shou was moved when he heard this, so he asked his maid to secretly communicate with him. Go there and stay at the appointed time. Shou Qiao was extremely agile and he climbed over the wall and entered the house without anyone knowing. Since then, Chong realized that Nu Sheng was wiping herself and her words were different from usual. Later, when he met with other officials, he heard that the shou had a strange fragrance, which was a tribute from foreign countries. If one person ate one chopstick, he would be able to eat it for months. I thought that Emperor Wu of the Han Dynasty only gave this incense to myself and Chen Qian, and no other family had this incense. I suspected that Shou had an affair with a girl, but the walls were heavy and the doors were steep. How could she have gotten there? He then made an excuse that there was a thief and ordered people to repair the wall. The envoy replied, "The rest is normal, except for the northeast corner where there seem to be traces of people. And the wall is too high for people to climb over." Chong then called the maids on either side of the girl for questioning, and they told him the situation. He kept it a secret and married his daughter to Shou.
When a senior official came to pay his respects, he would say no. When paying respects to someone, he should not be happy on that day. Women should not go beyond the border to pay respects to someone. On the day of paying respects, they should not drink alcohol or eat meat. When paying respects to a funeral, the person must hold the lead. If they follow the coffin to the grave, they should all hold the rope. When a public official pays respects, there must be someone to bow, even if they are friends or people from the state or village. When paying respects, he should say, "My lord will serve you." The host should say, "Come." When the lord sees the coffin on the road, he must send someone to pay his respects. When a senior official is buried, commoners should not receive his respects. If the brother of the wife's father dies, the son should be the main one, and he should not cry or jump. The husband should enter the room on the right, and have someone stand outside the door to inform the visitors. If they are close to him, he should go in and cry. If the father is alive, he should cry in the wife's room; if they are not the father's descendants, he should cry in other rooms. If there is a funeral, if you hear of the death of a distant brother, you should cry in the side room; if there is no side room, you should cry on the right side of the door; if they are from the same country, you should go to cry.
When Liu Qingsun was in the Taifu Mansion, he was framed by many people of the time. Only Yu Zisong was so absorbed in worldly affairs that he had no time to rest. Later, because he was frugal by nature and had a wealthy family, he persuaded the Grand Tutor to exchange it for tens of millions, hoping that the emperor would be stingy and he could take advantage of it. The Grand Tutor asked Yu in front of everyone. Yu was drunk at the time, with his cap falling on the table. He put his head to pick it up and replied slowly, "I have two or three thousand shawls at home. You can take whatever you want." Then he obeyed. Later, someone told Yu about this, and Yu said, "It can be said that one is using the concerns of a villain to judge the heart of a gentleman."
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