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Ziyou asked Confucius, and Confucius said, "No! Establish the grandson."
The enemy of the father will not live under the same sky with him. The enemy of the brother will not fight back. Friends are from different countries. There are many fortifications in the suburbs, which is a disgrace to the nobles. The land is vast, but it is uncultivated, which is also a disgrace to the scholars.
When Tao Gong was young, he worked as a fish weir official and once offered fish crucibles to his mother as a reward. The mother sealed the fish and gave it to the envoy, and wrote back to rebuke Kan, saying: "You are an official, and you use official goods to pay the bills. Not only is it of no benefit, but it also adds to my worries."
Someone asked: "What is a cane?" The answer is: bamboo and tung are the same. So for the father, a cane is made of bamboo; for the mother, a cane is made of tung.
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
When General Wang first wanted to go to the capital to make the arrangements, he sent a military officer to report to the court and to recommend the wise men of the time. Before Zu's cavalry arrived in Shouchun, he glared at his messenger and said in a stern voice, "You tell Ahei: How dare you be disrespectful! Hurry up and leave. If you don't do so in a moment, I will lead three thousand soldiers to advance with spears and feet!" The king stopped when he heard this.
Although Huiyuan was old, he never stopped giving lectures in Mount Lu. When some of his disciples regressed, Yuan Gong would say, "The light of the setting sun cannot shine far. I only hope that the light of the morning sun can shine with us." He would sit up and hold the scripture in his hand, reciting aloud with a bitter expression. All the senior students were in awe and showed respect.
When Shan Xia left Dongyang, Wang Changshi wrote to him to ask for Dongyang's help, saying: "You have inherited the harsh policies, so you can achieve peace and order."
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