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As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
When Shan Xia left Dongyang, Wang Changshi wrote to him to ask for Dongyang's help, saying: "You have inherited the harsh policies, so you can achieve peace and order."
The first ten years of a person's life are spent as a child, learning. At twenty, one is weak and then crowned. At thirty, a man is considered strong and has a wife. At forty one is strong and can serve in an official capacity. At fifty, he is called Ai, and he serves as an official. Sixty is called Ji, which means to give instructions. Seventy is considered old, and time for passing on. Eighty or ninety years old is called mao, and seven years old is called dao. Even if the people of dao and mao are guilty, they shall not be punished. A hundred years is called Yi.
Zhi Daoling asked someone to buy Yinshan Mountain from Lord Shen, who replied, "I have never heard of a nest. You went into seclusion by buying a mountain."
When Gu Rong was in Luoyang, he once accepted someone's invitation. He noticed that the person who was roasting meat wanted to be roasted too, so he stopped what he was doing. Those sitting together laughed at him. Rong said, "How can one hold it all day long and not know its taste?" Later, when he encountered chaos and had to cross the river, every time he was in danger, there was always one person by his side. When he asked him why, he found out that he was the one who was being burned.
When Grand Marshal Huan came down to the capital, he asked Zhenzhang, "I heard that the King of Kuaiji said that you are very advanced. Is that you?" Liu said, "You are very advanced, so you are the second-rate people!" Huan asked, "Who are the first-rate people?" Liu said, "It's us!"
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