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Confucius said: "After bowing, one should bow his head, which means he is in a state of slackness; after bowing his head, one should bow his head, which means he is in a state of height. During the three-year mourning period, I will follow the one who is in a state of height."
When Zhuge Jin was the governor of Yuzhou, he sent his personal driver to the platform and said, "The child is good at talking. You can talk to him." He went to see Ke, but Ke refused to meet him. Later, they met in Zhang Fu's and Wu's seat. The deputy driver called Ke: "You are so loud, young man." Ke mocked him and said: "Yuzhou is in chaos, why are you so loud?" He replied: "When the king is wise and the ministers are virtuous, I have never heard of chaos." Ke said: "In the past, Tang Yao was in the upper position, and the four villains were below." He replied: "Not only the four villains, there was also Danzhu." Then everyone in the room laughed.
Wang Ling went to see Xie Gong, and found Xi Zaochi was already sitting there, so he was supposed to lie on the same couch with him. The king wandered around without sitting down, so the duke invited him to sit on the couch opposite him. After he left, he said to Hu'er, "Zi Jing is indeed upright and honest, but people are too proud of you, which really damages his naturalness."
When the princes send out their wives, the wives will come to their country with the etiquette of wives; when they arrive, they will enter with wives. The messenger was about to order, saying, "My lord is incompetent and cannot serve the altars and ancestral temples. I have sent my envoy to report this to the steward." The host replied, "My lord has already refused to teach me before. I dare not be disrespectful and must wait for your order." The officials laid out the utensils; the host's officials also received them. When the wife left, the husband sent someone to bring her back, saying, "I am incompetent and cannot serve the altars and ancestral temples. I dare not be disrespectful and must wait for your order." The host replied, "My son is unfilial. I dare not avoid punishment. I dare not be disrespectful and must wait for your order." The messenger withdrew, and the host bowed to see him off. If the uncle is alive, he should be called uncle; if the uncle is dead, he should be called brother; if there is no brother, he should be called husband. The host's resignation was, "My son is unfilial." If they were aunts or sisters, they would also be called.
Tao Gong had great ambitions since he was young. His family was extremely poor, so he lived with his mother, Zhan. Fan Kui, a fellow countyman who was well-known, was selected as a filial and honest official and stayed at Kan's place. At that time, ice and snow accumulated day by day, and Kan's room was as dark as a hanging chime, while Kui had many horses and servants. Kan's mother, Mrs. Zhan, said to Kan, "You just go out and entertain the guests, and I will take care of the affairs myself." Zhan's hair fell to the ground, and the lower part was broken into two buns. She sold several bushels of rice, chopped down the pillars of the house, cut half of them into firewood, and ground the remaining hair into horse grass. Every day and evening, he provided fine food, so that his followers had nothing to lack. Kui was amazed at his eloquence and felt deeply ashamed of his kindness. The next morning he left, and Kan followed him closely, and they walked for about a hundred miles. Kui said, "The road is long, you should go back." Kan still did not return, so Kui said, "You can go now! We will talk about your good deeds in Luoyang." Kan then returned. Kui and Luo then praised them to Yang Zhi, Gu Rong and others, and they won great praise.
When you are about to move away, don't make things too tight. When you are about to go to class, your voice must be loud. There are two shoes outside. If you hear the words, you can enter. If you don’t hear the words, you can’t enter. When entering a house, one must look down. When entering a house, lock the door firmly and do not look back; when the door is opened, open it; when the door is closed, close it; if someone comes in later, lock the door and do not let them in. Do not step on shoes, do not step on mats, and do not move towards corners by picking up clothes. Be cautious and keep your promises.
Xie Gong said: "The wise and sages leave people behind, and their leisure time is also close." His sons and nephews did not agree with him. The Duke sighed and said, "If Xi Chao heard this, he would never reach the Hehan River."
Gu Yanxian loved the zither all his life, and when he died, his family members often placed the zither on the coffin. Zhang Jiying went to cry for him, unable to bear the grief, so he went straight to the bed, played the zither, and after playing a few songs, he said while playing the zither: "Does Gu Yanxian appreciate this?" He was in great grief again, so he left his filial son's hand without holding his.
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