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Men and women do not sit together, use the same shackles and towels, or combs, and are not taught in person. The sisters-in-law and uncles do not ask about each other, and the mothers do not wash their clothes. External words do not enter the bundle, and internal words do not leave the bundle.
Wang Changshi was the grandson of Yu Zigong. The Prime Minister said to Zigong: "I am a master of reasoning. I am superior to others."
Chen Zhongju once sighed and said: "People like Zhou Ziju are truly capable of governing a country. If compared to a precious sword, he is the best of the world."
As for a man, he sits like a corpse and stands like a monk. Etiquette should be in accordance with what is appropriate, and officials should follow customs. Rituals are used to determine closeness and distance, resolve suspicions, distinguish similarities and differences, and make clear right and wrong. Etiquette means not speaking ill of others and not refusing expenses. Etiquette means not exceeding the limit, not being invasive, and not being too intimate. Cultivating oneself and putting one's words into practice is called good deeds. Practicing, cultivating, and speaking the truth are the essence of etiquette. We hear about learning from others, not about learning from others. Etiquette is learned from those who come to learn, not from those who go to teach.
Sima Taifu was sitting in his study at night. At that time, the sky and the moon were bright and clear without any cloud. The Grand Tutor sighed and thought it was excellent. Xie Jingzhong was sitting there and replied, "I think it is not as good as a little cloud." The Grand Tutor then jokingly said to Xie, "Your heart is not pure, and you still want to pollute the Taiqing?"
When asked about the age of the emperor, he should answer, 鈥淚 heard that he started to wear clothes of a certain length.鈥 When asked about the age of the king, he should answer, 鈥淚 heard that he started to wear clothes of a certain length.鈥 When asked about the age of the king, he should answer, 鈥淗e can follow the affairs of the ancestral temple and the altar of grain when he is older; he should answer, 鈥淗e cannot follow the affairs of the ancestral temple and the altar of grain when he is younger.鈥 When asked about the son of a senior official, he should answer, 鈥淗e can drive when he is older; he cannot drive when he is younger.鈥 When asked about the son of a scholar, he should answer, 鈥淗e can handle the formalities of the reception when he is older; he cannot handle the formalities of the reception when he is younger.鈥 When asked about the son of a commoner, he should answer, 鈥淗e can carry firewood when he is older; he cannot carry firewood when he is younger.鈥 When asked about the wealth of the king, he should answer, 鈥淗e can cook food with his own strength, and he does not need to use sacrificial utensils and clothes.鈥 When asked about the wealth of a scholar, he should answer, 鈥淗e can carry firewood with his own strength.鈥 When asked about the wealth of common people, they should answer by counting their livestock.
When the king meets the guests, and the king bestows the title, they all bow twice and kowtow, and then rise to bow, which shows the etiquette of the ministers; the king returns the bow, and all the courtesy is returned, which shows the etiquette of the king. Ministers try their best to make contributions to the country, and the monarch will reward them with titles and salaries. Therefore, ministers should try their best to make contributions, so the country is safe and the monarch is at peace. There is no ritual that is not answered, which means that the superior does not take in vain from the subordinates. The superior must clarify the right way to guide the people, and the people follow the way and make contributions, and then take one tenth of it, so the superior has enough and the subordinate is not short of it; so the superior and the subordinate are in harmony and do not resent each other. Harmony and peace are the purpose of rituals; this is the great righteousness of the superior and the subordinate. Therefore, it is said that the banquet ritual is to clarify the righteousness of the superior and the subordinate.
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