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During the funeral of Confucius, two or three disciples all wore mourning clothes and went out. They wore mourning clothes when they were in a group, but not when they went out.
People of Pei Pushe's time called it a forest of conversation.
Zi You asked about funeral supplies, and Confucius said, "It is called the family's death." Zi You said, "If there is a death, how can it be prepared?" Confucius said, "If there is a death, don't go too far. If the body is dead, put the head and body together, return to the burial, hang the coffin and seal it, who will criticize it!" Si Shi Ben told Zi You, "Please cover the bed." Zi You said, "Yes." Xianzi heard it and said, "How rude Shu Shi is! He only gives people etiquette."
Kong Pushe was the attendant of Emperor Xiaowu, and was invited to visit Emperor Liezong's tomb in advance. Kong was the Minister of Rites at the time. He was thin and frail, and wore heavy mourning clothes. He cried all day long, and those who saw him thought he was a truly filial son.
Kang Sengyuan was in Yuzhang, several dozen miles away from the city, and built a monastery. There are mountains on the side and long rivers on the side, fragrant forests line the courtyards and clear streams rush around the halls. He studied and lectured at leisure, hoping to savor the essence of his works. Many people like Yu Gong went to see him. Watching him use breathing exercises, his temperament becomes better. In addition, he was content with his situation and felt happy, so his reputation grew. Later he couldn't bear it anymore and left.
When Sun Xinggong finished writing Tiantai Fu, he showed it to Fan Rongqi and said, "Try throwing it on the ground. It should make the sound of metal and stone." Fan said, "I'm afraid your metal and stone are not the middle tone of Gong Shang!" However, every time he came up with a good line, he would say, "It should be the language of our generation."
The most important thing is virtue, and the next best thing is to repay kindness. Reciprocity. It is not polite to go without coming back; it is also not polite to come without going back. When people are polite, they are safe; when they are impolite, they are in danger. Therefore it is said: Etiquette must be learned. The principle of etiquette is to humble oneself and respect others. Even a porter or peddler must be respected, let alone the rich and powerful? If a person is rich and noble but knows how to be polite, he will not be arrogant or licentious; if a person is poor and humble but knows how to be polite, he will not be deterred.
When the senior officials and scholars meet the king, if the king is pleased with them, they shall step aside, bow twice and kowtow; if the king greets them, they shall step aside and dare not return the bow. When the senior officials and scholars meet, even if they are of different ranks, if the host respects the guest, he shall bow to the guest first; if the guest respects the host, he shall bow to the host first. Unless they are mourning or meeting the king, they shall return the bow.
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