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When Xi Jiabin died, his attendants told Xi Gong that "his husband has passed away." Upon hearing this, Xi Gong was not sad, but said to his attendants, "We can tell you during the funeral." When Xi Gong went to the funeral, he was so sad that he almost died.
Jiang Pushe was young, and Prime Minister Wang asked him to play chess. Wang's skills are not as good as those of the other two, but he wants to compete with them. Let's try and see. The river does not flow immediately. Wang asked, "Why don't you do it?" Jiang said, "I'm afraid I can't do it." A guest nearby said, "This young man is not bad at playing games." Wang raised his head and said, "This young man is not only good at playing Go."
When Chen Yuanfang lost his father, he cried and mourned until his body became emaciated. His mother felt sorry for him and secretly covered him with a brocade quilt. Guo Linzong came to express his condolences and saw him, and said to him, "You are a talented person in the country, and a role model for the whole country. How can you mourn with a brocade quilt covering you? Confucius said, 'To wear brocade and to eat rice, what good will it do you?' I will not accept it!" He threw away his clothes and left. From then on, no guests came for a hundred days.
After Zhi Daoling passed away Faqian, his spirit became depressed and his character deteriorated. He often said to people: "In the past, Jiang Shi gave up his axe and asked the people of Ying for help, and Ya Sheng gave up his string instrument and asked Zhong Zi for help. They pushed themselves to seek outside, and it was not in vain! Now that the secret agreement is gone, no one will appreciate my words. With the knot in my heart, I will die!" One year later, Zhi died.
When General Wang started a rebellion, the Prime Minister and his brothers went to the palace to express their gratitude. The Duke of Zhou was deeply worried about the other kings. When he first entered, he looked very worried. The Prime Minister called out to Marquis Zhou, "All the people in the family are in your care!" Zhou went straight over but did not respond. Once you enter, you will be saved by the suffering. After being released, Zhou Da was very happy and drank some wine. When he went out, the kings were still waiting at the door. Zhou said, "This year, if we kill all the bandits and slaves, we will take a golden seal as big as a bowl and tie it behind our elbow." When the general arrived at Shitou, he asked the prime minister, "Can Lord Zhou be one of the Three Dukes?" The prime minister did not answer. He asked again, "Can you be the Minister of the Chancellery?" Again no answer. Because he said, "In this case, he should be killed!" Then he fell silent again. When Marquis Zhou was about to be killed, the prime minister later learned that Marquis Zhou had saved him. He sighed and said, "I didn't kill Marquis Zhou, but he died because of me. I have let him down in the underworld!"
Offering sacrifices and offering wine are respectful etiquette. Eating lungs is a ritual. Spitting wine is a ritual. At the end of the feast, it means that this is the main part of the feast, not just for eating and drinking, but for performing rituals. This is why rituals are valued and money is despised. After the cup is finished, it is placed on the west steps, which means that the feast is not just for eating and drinking. This is the meaning of putting rituals first and money second. If rituals are put first and money second, people will be respectful and yield without fighting.
Etiquette begins with the coming of age, is based on the wedding, is more important than funerals and sacrifices, is more respected than the morning engagement, and is harmonious with the archery field - this is the general outline of etiquette.
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